tOfficial "2014 LeBron James" Superthread

[Inquisitor95]

Lebrictionary

This all started a little over 3 years ago on the ESPN boards with a single term: Lebronstipation. I added the next 5 entries and other posters started coming up with their own. Thus Lebrictionary was born. It also lived under the names Encylopedia Lebritannica and Lebrikepia. It never lived long because some Lebron haters got way to nasty with it and some Lebron lovers got so bent out of shape they reported it until it got deleted.

I saved my best entries and now I think it can have a permanent home. This was undoubtedly the most popular thing I ever posted at ESPN. Enjoy.


Lebronstipation: the inability to get going when you need to get going

Lebronchitis: a respiratory condition which causes lots of choking

Lebronorrhea: a superstar-transmitted disease which can infect an entire team, causing its performance to go from great to grotesque

Lebrontasaurus: a massive beast with a tiny brain that failed to adapt to changes in its environment and is now extinct

Lebronage a trois: a threesome that sounded great at the time, but after having it turn out to be underwhelming, and enduring much ridicule and scorn from friends, makes one feel really filthy

Lebrontinence: when a poor performance by the Heat cause fans to wet their pants. Or worse

Lebrostitution: term used to describe how fans of the Miami Heat spend lots of money on a questionable product, and get screwed in the end

Lebroke:
1. Term used to describe when the Miami Heat are not playing up to expectations
2. Term used to describe those who consistently bet on the Miami Heat to win

Legoat: Leone who is to Leblame for Leloss (not to be confused with LeGOAT)

LeGOAT: the association of Lebron with the acronym GOAT, which stands for Grossly Overrated at Times

Lebronster: what you get when you continue to feed an ego that was already too big to begin with

Lebronese: a language consisting primarily of hundreds of adjectives describing the greatness of Lebron, which only makes sense to those who speak it

Lebrownies: Term used to describe brown nosers of Lebron

Lebronze: manufactured metal that no matter how you clean, polish, or treat it, is still not golden, and only good for third place in the Olympics

Lebotomy: the removal of the part of the brain that understands that Lebron’s stats are significantly below those of Michael Jordan and many others in the NBA finals

Lebreak: what Lebron tells his teammates he’s taking when he skips out of practice to go to the local jewelry store to verify his ring size

Lekingdom: where the faithful shall gather to celebrate the greatness of the King. Present location: Fantasyland at Disneyworld

Lebreakup: separation fans of Lebron feel when they finally realize that he is not meeting their needs. The process has multiple stages (denial, anger, etc.) until reaching acceptance of the situation and moving on with their lives

Leberation: feeling of freedom after going through a Lebreakup

Lechemistry: sub-branch of chemistry dealing with the combining of the most unstable and volatile agents and watching the reactions, usually from a very safe distance

Leblackout: term used to describe the phenomenon of the mass power off at the same time of TV sets watching the NBA finals. The effect in the Miami area was so pronounced the local electric company thought it was dealing with a power failure

Lebronade: drink made with lemons that, no matter how much sugar you add to it, it still tastes sour and unsatisfying

Casa Blanka: nickname for the Miami Heat’s arena, characterized by the fans’ blank shirts and blank stares

“Oh Lehumanity!”: phrase first said in the latter part of the NBA Finals, comparing the Heat’s meltdown against the Mavericks to the destruction of the Hindenburg

Lebronstitution: not to be mistaken for Lebrostitution, this is the term describing Lebron’s contract with the Heat. Around 90 percent of the document deals with how and when Lebron gets paid, and even includes a Bill of Rights, which summarized states that Lebron has the right to as many bills as Lebron desires.

Lebronsibility: unusual dual-natured property, in that at times is indefinable and not measurable. For example when the Heat win, Lebronsibility is as clear as day but when the Heat lose, it cannot be pinpointed.

Dirkorations: nickname for 2010-11 championship rings

Ridirkculous: term to describe Lebron's play in the NBA Finals

Wii Choke: new video game coming out for the Wii this summer, giving the player the experience of what it was like to play for the Miami Heat last season

Lebroncentration: the ability to stay focused on your public image and not be distracted by lesser things, such as how to win championships

“Lebronte’s Inferno”: latest nickname for the Miami Heat. Not 1, not 2, not 3, not 4, not 5, not 6, not 7, not 8, but 9 circles of Hell. Abandon all hope ye who enter AmericanAirlines arena.

Lebrononucleosis: mysterious illness which strikes in NBA playoff games, usually in the 4th Quarter. Also known as the "missing disease."

LeStooge: sure Curly James gets the most attention, and Larry Bosh is often overlooked, but wiseguys and even knuckleheads know that it is Moe Wade that runs the show.

LeBroken Arrow: an event which triggers a major meltdown of one or more members of the Heat

Lebridesmaid: never a Lebride

LeBrontanamo Bay: “Training camp” superstars that don’t live up to expectations are sent

 

[gordontrue]

I will admit that some of these are rather clever.

Most Le-nicknames are unfunny, stupid, and played out. But some of these original. Bravo.

 

[TurnUpTheHeat]

I read where he was seen talking to a Real Estate agent in L.A. and has contacted a couple of posh private schools for his kids. This has to take the panic level to at least DefCon 2!!

I would think that if it was true, that it would cause as much or more panic for Lakers fans.
Why on earth would any Lakers fan think or assume that if James were going to L.A. that it wouldn't be to play on the Clippers?

 

[Retroram52]

Good point Turnup. I still think LeBron is going to re-sign with the Heat. He is just doing like Swaggy P and others. They are doing their due diligence and seeing what is available in the open market. Riley knows this and the bottom line is that there will be more moves in the future for the Heat and three of them could very well be the re-signing of the big three.

 

[TurnUpTheHeat]

Good point Turnup. I still think LeBron is going to re-sign with the Heat. He is just doing like Swaggy P and others. They are doing their due diligence and seeing what is available in the open market. Riley knows this and the bottom line is that there will be more moves in the future for the Heat and three of them could very well be the re-signing of the big three.

I saw that Swaggy is going to test the market.
What do you think he will be offered?

My best guess for him would be 3 year 8-10M.

 

[Retroram52]

Yep, that is about what he'll fetch and not a farthing more. I think he really wants to play for the Lakers and he is a bit frustrated that they appear to be dragging their feet. Sort of like alot of fans that want the Heat roster to be finalized for next season like yesterday. Riley's words come to play here. Get a grip. It'll get done when all of the gyrations of players testing the market are complete. That will take some time.

 

[Lone Granger]

 

[trojanfan12]

I would think that if it was true, that it would cause as much or more panic for Lakers fans.
Why on earth would any Lakers fan think or assume that if James were going to L.A. that it wouldn't be to play on the Clippers?

Who said anything about what team he might go to? Pretty sure the comment was that he was meeting with a Real Estate agent and checked out a couple of schools. No mention of a team.

I guess the stress of it all is just too much for some of you.

 

[TurnUpTheHeat]

Who said anything about what team he might go to? Pretty sure the comment was that he was meeting with a Real Estate agent and checked out a couple of schools. No mention of a team.

I guess the stress of it all is just too much for some of you.

I never said that YOU mentioned a team and my question wasn't directed solely to you.
Ram had no problem comprehending it.
Many Laker fans though are throwing scenarios around where he would come to the Lakers, where the Clippers is a hell of a lot more likely if James wants to play in L.A..

That would be a HUGE blow to Lakers fans, and that's all I was pointing out.

 

[trojanfan12]

I never said that YOU mentioned a team and my question wasn't directed solely to you.
Ram had no problem comprehending it.
Many Laker fans though are throwing scenarios around where he would come to the Lakers, where the Clippers is a hell of a lot more likely if James wants to play in L.A..

That would be a HUGE blow to Lakers fans, and that's all I was pointing out.

You quoted me, correct? Also, haven't seen many/if any Lakers fans indulging in such scenarios. The vast majority of Lakers fans believe that Lebron isn't going anywhere. There are a couple of talking heads on ESPN who have presented scenarios where the Lakers could land Lebron (I'm about half convinced that the NBA has it in the contract that ESPN has to include the Lakers in every superstar FA discussion), but I haven't seen any Lakers fans doing this. Are you confusing ESPN talking heads for Lakers fans?


I even saw some idiot suggesting that the Lakers took on all of those expiring contracts last year specifically to try and land both Lebron and 'Melo.

Most Lakers fans believe that the Lakers will make the best offer that they can for Lebron (as will virtually every other team) and Lebron will remain in Miami.


Bottom line is that we are going to see all kinds of far fetched scenarios where Lebron could end up on just about every team in the league before this is all said and done.

Also, if the Clippers want to have a shot at Lebron, they are going to have to find away to shed some contracts.

 

[anotheridiot]

So wait...I gotta jump in on this "why the Heat lost to the Spurs" argument. Nobody was talking about how old the Heat were after they beat Indiana. Everyone was lauding the fact that they made the Finals 4 straight times. Nobody was talking about how old they were after it was 1-1. The Heat "looked" old because San antonio made them look that way. That Miami team was good enough, they just were outplayed, outstrategized, and outteamed(that's not a word I know) by San antonio

The heat lost because LeBron could not guard 4 people. They lost for defensive reasons. Wade claimed he was not hurt, it was not physical. I dont know what else that leaves other than he lost his game sitting out half the season on forced days off and was not in shape for the playoffs.

Its funny how people think Lebron is only opting out to take less money again to play with Carmello, possibly in Miami. He already is costing himself 40 million since he didnt take max money in miami, it lowers what his max contract can be. If he truly takes less to go play with carmello, and carmello takes less than max to play with him, the tide might turn.

I know he does not need the money. His shoe contract makes his nba salary look like a tip. The real money is in selling shoes. The ego makes you need to be the highest paid player in the nba. LeBron will show us how much is ego when he decides.

 

[lakersrule]

I never said that YOU mentioned a team and my question wasn't directed solely to you.
Ram had no problem comprehending it.
Many Laker fans though are throwing scenarios around where he would come to the Lakers, where the Clippers is a hell of a lot more likely if James wants to play in L.A..

That would be a HUGE blow to Lakers fans, and that's all I was pointing out.

For the Clippers to get Lebron, they either have to basically gut the team besides CP3 and Griffin while not taking back salary, or do a S&T with Griffin. They aren't trading Griffin. It would be virtually impossible to clear the cap space by trading everyone. If they did that, they'd have a lot of roster spots to fill with minimum contracts. I don't think the Clippers are a realistic landing spot for the Lebron.

 

[TurnUpTheHeat]

You quoted me, correct? Also, haven't seen many/if any Lakers fans indulging in such scenarios. The vast majority of Lakers fans believe that Lebron isn't going anywhere. There are a couple of talking heads on ESPN who have presented scenarios where the Lakers could land Lebron (I'm about half convinced that the NBA has it in the contract that ESPN has to include the Lakers in every superstar FA discussion), but I haven't seen any Lakers fans doing this. Are you confusing ESPN talking heads for Lakers fans?


I even saw some idiot suggesting that the Lakers took on all of those expiring contracts last year specifically to try and land both Lebron and 'Melo.

Most Lakers fans believe that the Lakers will make the best offer that they can for Lebron (as will virtually every other team) and Lebron will remain in Miami.


Bottom line is that we are going to see all kinds of far fetched scenarios where Lebron could end up on just about every team in the league before this is all said and done.

Also, if the Clippers want to have a shot at Lebron, they are going to have to find away to shed some contracts.

I quoted your post, not some talking head.
So what?

My reply said Lakers fans. I addressed the words in the post, not you directly.


You're the one who threw the house hunting in LA scenario out there.
Now all of the sudden it's that far fetched IYO?

Then why mention it at all?

Your intent was to somehow make Heat fans nervous about the situation,
when truth be told, as I pointed out, is that Lakers fans should be equally or more nervous IF
hes house hunting in LA, as YOU suggested.

 

[lakersrule]

You quoted me, correct? Also, haven't seen many/if any Lakers fans indulging in such scenarios. The vast majority of Lakers fans believe that Lebron isn't going anywhere. There are a couple of talking heads on ESPN who have presented scenarios where the Lakers could land Lebron (I'm about half convinced that the NBA has it in the contract that ESPN has to include the Lakers in every superstar FA discussion), but I haven't seen any Lakers fans doing this. Are you confusing ESPN talking heads for Lakers fans?


I even saw some idiot suggesting that the Lakers took on all of those expiring contracts last year specifically to try and land both Lebron and 'Melo.

Most Lakers fans believe that the Lakers will make the best offer that they can for Lebron (as will virtually every other team) and Lebron will remain in Miami.


Bottom line is that we are going to see all kinds of far fetched scenarios where Lebron could end up on just about every team in the league before this is all said and done.

Also, if the Clippers want to have a shot at Lebron, they are going to have to find away to shed some contracts.

Not some. Virtually all of them.

Uphill battle in hunt for LeBron James - ESPN Los Angeles

 

[TurnUpTheHeat]

For the Clippers to get Lebron, they either have to basically gut the team besides CP3 and Griffin while not taking back salary, or do a S&T with Griffin. They aren't trading Griffin. It would be virtually impossible to clear the cap space by trading everyone. If they did that, they'd have a lot of roster spots to fill with minimum contracts. I don't think the Clippers are a realistic landing spot for the Lebron.

I read/ heard somewhere they would need Riley to do a sign and trade for Jordan/Crawford.
Riley isn't going to ever do that IMO.

If James REALLY was committed to wanting to be a Clipper, do you really think they wouldn't trade Griffin?
I'm not near so sure they wouldn't if it means yes or no to getting James.

He is the only player that I could even envision Riley agreeing to a sign and trade for.

 

[Sportsman]

Lebron is coming to the Clippers

Yahoo Sports reported yesterday that Lebron finds the Clippers intriguing. Wow, Lebron did everything but come out and say it, he wants to be a Clipper. Lebron wants to play with legit superstars and legit coach and Miami offers none of that. Lebron is making the right move, the Clippers are the future of the NBA.

 

[lakersrule]

I read/ heard somewhere they would need Riley to do a sign and trade for Jordan/Crawford.
Riley isn't going to ever do that IMO.

If James REALLY was committed to wanting to be a Clipper, do you really think they wouldn't trade Griffin?
I'm not near so sure they wouldn't if it means yes or no to getting James.

He is the only player that I could even envision Riley agreeing to a sign and trade for.

They are not trading Griffin, and if the narrative is that Lebron wants to play on a title contending team, losing Griffin makes the Clippers a less desirable landing spot in that respect.

Perhaps the Lebron looking at LA real estate and schools is a ploy to put pressure on Riles to get done what Lebron wants.

 

[lakersrule]

Unlikely IMO. There are too many contracts to shed to open up the cap space. Riles isn't interested in a S&T based around Jordan/Crawford. The Clippers aren't trading Griffin. I just don't see it unless he signs for much less than his value.

 

[TurnUpTheHeat]

They are not trading Griffin, and if the narrative is that Lebron wants to play on a title contending team, losing Griffin makes the Clippers a less desirable landing spot in that respect.

Perhaps the Lebron looking at LA real estate and schools is a ploy to put pressure on Riles to get done what Lebron wants.

James would be an idiot to go to any team in the West.
He's not stupid.
His best path to championships right now is to stay put and hope the Spurs lose before the Finals.

I'm still not convinced the Clippers wouldn't trade Griffin, but I don't think we'll ever find out.

 

[RobToxin]

Why LeBron isn't joining your team - NBA - SI.com