Horror Movies

[returnofjakedog]

Bro, you get a break. This is Linda Blair in...Hell Night!
My review?

Hell No!

Even Linda is dismayed about this one.

View attachment 282369

Lol!
I looked up her filmography after guessing and saw that one.

The only other movies I remember seeing her in were the b-grade women in prison and revenge flicks she did around that time like Chained Heat and Savage Streets.
I never saw Hell Night though.

 

[Blackshirts BLVD]

 

[returnofjakedog]

Alright, y'all Horror Movie Experts!

Name this movie and if you've ever seen it, please give an opinion.

If I have to name the woman pictured, I will be embarrassed for each and every one of you.

View attachment 282345

.........the Devil, I mean Linda, doesn't appear until near the end.

 

[Nasty_Magician]

So aside from wrapping up the Creepshow series (hit and miss but awesome), watched 3 movies so far this weekend.

Trilogy of Terror on Amazon, super 70s and dated, I almost appreciated how horrifically 1970s it was. It's 3 separate stories all with the same actress, 1st was ok, 2nd was terrible and 3rd was best of the bunch. I can't endorse it but if you're really desperate you can skip to the third story.

Blood Red Sky on Netflix, vampires on a plane, thought it was great. Probably 15-20 mins too long but thought the vampires were creepy, once the action picked up it didn't let off the gas. Definitely worth a watch.

Await Further Instructions on Netflix, thought it would have been better as a short. Started off interestingly enough and slowly lost steam as it went on. By the end I didn't really care about any of the people and the payoff was a bit weak. It's skippable.

And then of course I've been popping in and out of AMC to catch parts of the Halloween marathon.

 

[returnofjakedog]

Happy Halloween!

 

[R.J. MacReady]

Last Night In Soho is a great flick. Best Horror release this month IMO.

 

[Nasty_Magician]

 

[returnofjakedog]

So just got back from the drive-in theatre, always a fun experience albeit a little cold.
Triple feature......
*......starting with g-rated Hotel Transylvania. Seen it before. Technically impressive film, with boring storyline and forgettable monsters. For hyperactive kids. Adam Sandler and co. I don't recommend. Maybe 4.5 to 5 outta 10 range just for the boredom.
*The final feature was the good, but not quite as good as the first, Don't Breathe 2. We've already reviewed and discussed it here. Fun ride! I think I gave it a 7-7.5 range.
*I want to briefly discuss the middle feature, Venom: Let There Be Carnage.


Much like The Punisher, Venom is a character you CANNOT make a PG-13 movie out of. Needs a Rated-R reboot. Now I saw the first Venom movie and it suffered from the same issues, so I knew what to expect going in but it is still mediocre at best. Made for hyperactive 10 to 15 year olds. A mass of cgi action. Quite violent but tries to be a comedy at the same time, which comes off awkward and rushed. Lots of anonymous kills, but almost zero gore. A waste of Woody Harrelson and Thomas Hardy (among others). I'll go 5 outta 10 just because I liked it slightly better than Hotel T.
As the credits rolled I saw Thomas Hardy is credited as a writer, and, Andy Serkis as the director! Andy is the famous voice body actor who played Golumn in the Lord of the Rings films, Caeser in the 3 Planet of the Apes remakes, King Kong in the '05 version, and many more. I think he should stick to the acting side.

 

[DJ Fieri]

 

[Blackshirts BLVD]

 

[DJ Fieri]

 

[DJ Fieri]

 

[returnofjakedog]

Re-watched Motel Hell (1980), a movie that answers the question "What's in Farmer Vincent's fritters?"


So this one is a cult classic black comedy horror from director Kevin Connor, who did a lot of documentaries, a crapload of forgettable tv episodes/movies, some horror and exploitation, but is best known for fantasy-adventure flicks like At the Earth's Core, and The Land That Time Forgot. Basically he seems to do whatever gives him a paycheck.

The main "stars" of the movie are the antagonists, the legendary Rory Calhoun as Farmer Vincent, and his sis Ida, the lady who played Belluah Ballbreaker in Porkys. They run a hotel and sell salted meat products out of their smokehouse. The "surprise" (from a 41 year old film) is that they capture people, bury them up to their necks, slit their vocal cords, put bags on their heads, and fatten them up to harvest them for their sausages.

A competently done movie with actors that generally buy into the weird premise. It never goes full exploitation or approaches the TCM grittiness you would expect from the premise. Instead we get a mostly bloodless movie that is shot in a straightforward manner. Some good violence though.

The protagonists are basically forgettable. The brother cop and the love interest are almost expendable.

John Ratzenberger/Cliff Clavin makes an appearance, being completely miscast as a punk rock band member touring around in an old van despite being in his mid 30s and already having his old man mustache.

Perhaps it is best known for the chainsaw battle with Rory C wearing a big pig head.



It does have the distinction of having the most expensive/collectable Fangoria issue due to rarity after the cover image was banned and pulled from shelves.

A decent little '80s black comedy cult horror. I'll give it a 6 outta 10.

 

[returnofjakedog]

LMAO... Did anyone know that they did a Grudge & Ring crossover film? The J-film came out in 2016.

The Ring Takes on The Grudge in the First Trailer for Japanese Horror's Ultimate Crossover

Going to have to watch this ASAP!

@FaCe-LeE-uS
Did you ever watch this? Was it any good?

 

[FaCe-LeE-uS]

@FaCe-LeE-uS
Did you ever watch this? Was it any good?

Nah I could never convince the wife it was worth it... And honestly I completely forgot about it after that

 

[returnofjakedog]

Going ol' school with Hammer Films' Kiss of the Vampire (1963)


Typical Hammer vampire film with the main differentiations being:
a) it is a bit earlier than most so it doesn't embrace the schlockiness as much as their later (late '60s through mid '70s) fare, and
b) no "big name" stars (ie: Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, etc) that you usually get.

The storyline is fairly typical as it is basically a "modern" (1900ish) retelling of Dracula with vampire cult members tossed in. Couple gets stranded in small Slavic town, go to local estate and meet vampire leader who kidnaps girl. Man meets vampire hunter and they team up to fight baddies.

Not badly done, but nothing specific that really makes it stand out from the pack. Acting, direction, production values, storyline are all solid enough. The lead, Edward DeSouza, does good enough but his wife is the typical wide-eyed damsel that exists only to be captured and rescued.

The finale is pretty hilarious with a huge flock of animated bats attacking, followed up by dozens of rubber bats on strings killing off the cult. Also the opening funeral scene with the vampire hunter is very well done.

Probably the biggest negative for me is that the vampires are not very effective. They don't seem to want to make a real effort to kill off the antagonists. They seem more bored and willing to just try to ignore them than viciously destroying them.

Overall decent but doesn't age well for modern audiences. For fans of the Hammer legacy.

I'll go 5.5 outta 10 for what it is. It probably would have been a 7 or so back in it's day.

 

[FaCe-LeE-uS]

Going ol' school with Hammer Films' Kiss of the Vampire (1963)


Typical Hammer vampire film with the main differentiations being:
a) it is a bit earlier than most so it doesn't embrace the schlockiness as much as their later (late '60s through mid '70s) fare, and
b) no "big name" stars (ie: Christopher Lee, Peter Cushing, etc) that you usually get.

The storyline is fairly typical as it is basically a "modern" (1900ish) retelling of Dracula with vampire cult members tossed in. Couple gets stranded in small Slavic town, go to local estate and meet vampire leader who kidnaps girl. Man meets vampire hunter and they team up to fight baddies.

Not badly done, but nothing specific that really makes it stand out from the pack. Acting, direction, production values, storyline are all solid enough. The lead, Edward DeSouza, does good enough but his wife is the typical wide-eyed damsel that exists only to be captured and rescued.

The finale is pretty hilarious with a huge flock of animated bats attacking, followed up by dozens of rubber bats on strings killing off the cult. Also the opening funeral scene with the vampire hunter is very well done.

Probably the biggest negative for me is that the vampires are not very effective. They don't seem to want to make a real effort to kill off the antagonists. They seem more bored and willing to just try to ignore them than viciously destroying them.

Overall decent but doesn't age well for modern audiences. For fans of the Hammer legacy.

I'll go 5.5 outta 10 for what it is. It probably would have been a 7 or so back in it's day.

Ahh Hammer Films bring back fond memories… One of the best decisions they ever made was when Tony Hinds pushed them into Horror films after he assumed production control after his father, cofounder of Hammer Films, passed the torch. The Quartermass Xperiment or whatever it was called was one of my favorite Hammer Films and the beginning of a new era in Hammer Films.

 

[returnofjakedog]

Ahh Hammer Films bring back fond memories… One of the best decisions they ever made was when Tony Hinds pushed them into Horror films after he assumed production control after his father, cofounder of Hammer Films, passed the torch. The Quartermass Xperiment or whatever it was called was one of my favorite Hammer Films and the beginning of a new era in Hammer Films.

Yeah. I looked their history and I was a bit off on the timeline as '63 wasn't early for their horror era.
I need to go back and watch some of their early stuff. I've seen some of it here and there. I think remember Captain Kronos: Vampire Slayer the most.

 

[returnofjakedog]

Blood Quantum (2019)-


An isolated community largely made up of indigenous folks in rural Canada survives a z-pocalypse and fights to remain stable as things collapse around them.

Not a bad entry in the post apocalyptic zombie field but nothing really original. Still, had a little budget behind it and it is much better than a lot of the oversaturated z genre.

The good:
*Fxs. Good zombies and gore
*Professionally shot. Some good cinematography.
*Storyline is solid. Some clunky execution at times though.

The bad:
*The characters. Even right after watching I only vaguely remember the main protagonists and I never really care about them. The main antagonist is way too over the top and annoying imo.
*The story brings nothing new to the table. It feels like they just took aspects of Romero's Day of the Dead and Land of the Dead (among others) and just rehashed them as almost straight up copies. Plus the attached social commentary is a bit hamfisted.

Watchable for zombie fans but I don't recommend to anyone beyond that. Good zombie and gore fxs make it somewhat palatable.
5 outta 10 from me. Middle of the road.

 

[returnofjakedog]

Bruce is back!!!.......and he is battling demonic zombie types!