F**K Everbody: I'm Gonna Insult Every P5 Team in Due Time in This Thread

[tnapucco]

NEBRASKA: During their home games you'll see more purple hair in the stands than Burning Man, Coachella and every Gay Pride parade ever held COMBINED. These flatlanders make Kansans look like a Mensa-hosted SpaceX launch viewing party. If it weren't for the crackdown on PEDs and partial-qualifiers, they'd still be a middling shit team. Tom Osborne is like a creepy Mr. Rogers with the personality of a burlap sack giving a TED talk on choking with class. Every time I take a shit and see corn in my stools, I think of Nebraska.

 

[Blackshirts BLVD]

NEBRASKA: Talk about your fucking retards. These dumbfucks have packed their stadium for the last 20 years even though they have sucked more hind tit than @iowajerms . And here these asshats think Scott Frost is the savior-boy that is gonna save the day. 4-8 clown shoes, and a loss in back-to-back seasons to shit-ass Colorado. Talk about a bunch of fucking has beens. Most of these dipshits are probably still jacking off to '90s videos of Tommie Frazier and Lawrence Phillips.

 

[HuskerOC]

UCLA/USC: Yes, I'm grouping this fuckshow together. While USC has a much more storied history, there is absolutley no reason why these crapshow programs aren't both consistently in the Top 20 or even Top 10. Fuck Pete Carrol. John Robinson is crazy mad about these tow fuckfests. Then again, it is California. Everything in California sucks now.

UTAH: How do you insult Mormons? Fuck you all, we start playing on Sundays in the Pac12.

VIRGINIA: I remember the Moore to Moore in 1990 or something with Shawn Moore and Herman Moore. Other than that? You guys suck. Have always sucked, and will likely forever suck.

VIRGINIA TECH: Frank Beamer put you clowns on the map. Quit fucking it up.

WAKE FOREST: Does anybody fucking care about your football program? Is there a dipshit Wake fan on this site?

 

[mrwallace2ku]

everyone of our players gets one of these…your school not so much?

 

[mrwallace2ku]

OREGON STATE: Never mattered. And never will matter. Nobody gives a fuck about deez guise.

 

[HuskerOC]

WASHINGTON: These fucknuts believe they have the loudest stadium in the cuntry cuz shit rattles of the tin roof. They also believe their Navy every Saturday is impressive. Maybe the most clueless bunch in all of college football regarding what is going on in the real world of college football. Love seeing this team and program back, but check your asses at the door with the hype and foolishness.

WASHINGTON STATE: Most overrated coach in all of college football. Sure this dipshit that the press and fans adore can win games, but his shit little system never works when it really counts. For fucks sake, many thought Ryan Leaf was the better pick than Peyton Manning back in the day. Either way, has this school ever done shit. Ever?

WEST VIRGINIA: Back when Major Harris was running the show this crap school had a chance. Even rolling the Big East with RichRod never amounted to shit. Since then, they have sucked almost every year. Even the Skullet left town to corch at a non-P5 school in Houston for shits sake.

WISCONSIN: Maybe the cockiest loudmouth belligerent fans in all of college football. Then again, they wear cheese on their heads come Sunday. Zero fucking Nattys from this clan of dipshits, but you'd think you were talking to a Notre Dame fan. Assholes abound in Madison. If they can't beat you on the field, they'll look to kick your ass in an alley and never buy a drink for anybody. This clan truly is a bunch of fucking assholes. Also the most boring team in all of college football.

 

[HuskerOC]

Fuck everybody.

 

[douggie]

"Is it Nebrasketball season yet?"

 

[Deep Creek]

Good time to be G5!

 

[HuskerOC]

NEBRASKA: During their home games you'll see more purple hair in the stands than Burning Man, Coachella and every Gay Pride parade ever held COMBINED. These flatlanders make Kansans look like a Mensa-hosted SpaceX launch viewing party. If it weren't for the crackdown on PEDs and partial-qualifiers, they'd still be a middling shit team. Tom Osborne is like a creepy Mr. Rogers with the personality of a burlap sack giving a TED talk on choking with class. Every time I take a shit and see corn in my stools, I think of Nebraska.

I'm sorry you were offended.

Now politely go fuck yourself.

 

[Bedlam131]

 

[Tenn"cock]

SOUTH CAROLINA: Greatest mascot and hats ever. GO COCKS! You still suck major ass. George Rogers didn't deserve the Heisman in 1980 and you know it, and not even Lou Holtz or Steve Spurrier could get you clowns into the SEC Championship game. You guise need a tornado to hit the Southeast that effects everybody but you to be competitive. What a bunch of sorry fucks of 90K that fill that stadium of no reward.

Actually Spurrier did get the Gamecocks into the SECCG in 2010. You suck major ass.

 

[HuskerOC]

You know you can just type ‘fuck’ right?

F**k you.

 

[HuskerOC]

Actually Spurrier did get the Gamecocks into the SECCG in 2010. You suck major ass.

Color me crooked.

Did they win? Or did dey get dere asses kicked?

 

[HuskerOC]

"Is it Nebrasketball season yet?"

It is Volleyball season asshat.

 

[gob]

OHIO STATE: Righteous pricks of all pricks. O-H-I-O. Congrats, you mudder-fuckas can spell. The beloved Woody Hayes tackled a guy on the field in his late days cuz he couldn't handle losing. The Vest was a calculated asshole and cheated. And Urban Legend is as disgusting piece of shit we have all seen in quite some time. You fucktards don't give any shits other than winning. Of all the football factory programs out there, this may be the most disgusting of them all.

OKLAHOMA: They had a starting QB arrested and put in prison for master-minding a cocaine ring. But hey, Barry Switzer didn't give a shit, so why should I give a shit? In nutshell you can come down to 5 simple words for the Oklahoma football program: "Can he play on Saturday". Never matters how you get him there to play, just him there to play.

OKLAHOMA STATE: Fucking corch is 4o and has a fucking mullet only a pro wrassler would be proud about. I've been to Stillwater, that shithole is about as exciting as a Sunday brunch with the in-laws. These cheatin' sunsabitches paid for Gundy, Hart Lee Dykes, Thurman Thomas, Leslie O
'Neil and Barry Sanders and STILL couldn't win an 8 team conference. What a bunch of fucking losers.

OREGON: Fuck a duck. This complete shitshow of a program wants so mightily to believe they belong. You had your shot champ, even with the NIKE funding, gay as fuck uni's and all that. Still wasn't good enough. And then Chip left. My father's best friend played C for this shitnest of fuckville back in the day in the Rose Bowl. Still can't counter the loudest most extreme asshole fans on the internet though. Truly a special group of fucks.

OREGON STATE: Never mattered. And never will matter. Nobody gives a fuck about deez guise.

Technically, he punched someone... Not tackled

 

[HuskerOC]

View attachment 217109

My apologies that you suck.

 

[HuskerOC]

Technically, he punched someone... Not tackled

I stand corrected. My apologies to you and your family.

 

[douggie]

It is Volleyball season asshat.

 

[HuskerOC]

I don't want to leave any of you assholes out.

Did I officially offend you?

All replies welcome. Especially from douche canoes.