"You’re a lame one, Mr. Wentz"

[Inquisitor95]

It's been a long time since I've written any parodies, other than a few lines here and there. I've been lacking time and inspiration. But thanks to certain posters in a certain thread, I've found inspiration. And once I got going, it was like it wrote itself in no time. So without further ado, I present to you my latest creation.


You’re a lame one, Mr. Wentz
You're really athletic kitsch
You’re as fragile as a flower
You’re as brittle as a bitch, Mr. Wentz...
You’re a pair of moldy underwear with a painful rectal itch


You disappoint us, Mr. Wentz
You’re running out of tricks
Your hair is way too ginger
Your legs are like two sticks, Mr. Wentz...
I wouldn’t draft you if I had thirty-nine and a half first-round picks


You’re a quitter, Mr. Wentz
You give your fans such grief
You have the testicular fortitude of a transgender Ryan Leaf, Mr. Wentz...
Given the choice between the two of you...
I’d take the transgender Ryan Leaf


You’re a frail one, Mr. Wentz
Your knee is mangled junk
Your arm is flimsy rubber
Your mind is in a funk, Mr. Wentz...
The three words that now best describe Eagles fans
Are as follows and I quote...
“Drink, drank, drunk!”


You’re a weakling, Mr. Wentz
You’re the king of worthless stats
Your team’s a wasted trainwreck full of whiny spoiled brats, Mr. Wentz...
Your fan base is an appalling dump heap,
Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,
And did I mention...phenomenal asshats


You nauseate me, Mr. Wentz
With a Philly Special stench
You make viewers switch to soccer
And should’ve long been on the bench, Mr. Wentz...
You’re a limburger cheesesteak and shit sandwich...with extra-weak sauce!

 

[Used 2 B Hu]

Decent

Really liked the Drink Drank Drunk part though

 

[jarntt]

Decent

Really liked the Drink Drank Drunk part though

 

[tnapucco]

Would have been nice if you could have worked in Foles somehow...lots of shit rhymes with Foles....oh, and Lane Johnson/PEDs too.

 

[Inquisitor95]

Decent

Really liked the Drink Drank Drunk part though

I thought coming up with the transgender Ryan Leaf was my favorite.

 

[Used 2 B Hu]

I thought coming up with the transgender Ryan Leaf was my favorite.

That was solid, Omar probably approves

 

[Omar 382]

That was solid, Omar probably approves

Meh, not awful, but it's been done before. 2/5 stars.

 

[catlanta33]

Would have been nice if you could have worked in Foles somehow...lots of shit rhymes with Foles....oh, and Lane Johnson/PEDs too.

I prefer to remind them they signed a piece of shit that assaulted an old lady in a wheelchair.

 

[Brees#1]

Wentz is a better QB, but he just may not be the better fit for the eagles. With Foles, they run more. It must not be understated though that Sproles has been back and Wentz hasn't played with him all season until Dallas. Take Sproles away from that game and it's not what it is. He had a big play that led to one of Philly's scores. And that was a difference maker. What I am saying is Wentz will be good for another team, but many of the players on this team have chemistry with Foles because players like Cox and Jenkins have played with him before. It's not like Wentz played awful against Dallas.

 

[FaCe-LeE-uS]

I chortled at the Ryan Leaf bit... Good work!

 

[Dr. Strangelove]

It's always nice to have a good chuckle at the expense of others. Thanks for the laugh.

 

[B_dub]

It's been a long time since I've written any parodies, other than a few lines here and there. I've been lacking time and inspiration. But thanks to certain posters in a certain thread, I've found inspiration. And once I got going, it was like it wrote itself in no time. So without further ado, I present to you my latest creation.


You’re a lame one, Mr. Wentz
You're really athletic kitsch
You’re as fragile as a flower
You’re as brittle as a bitch, Mr. Wentz...
You’re a pair of moldy underwear with a painful rectal itch


You disappoint us, Mr. Wentz
You’re running out of tricks
Your hair is way too ginger
Your legs are like two sticks, Mr. Wentz...
I wouldn’t draft you if I had thirty-nine and a half first-round picks


You’re a quitter, Mr. Wentz
You give your fans such grief
You have the testicular fortitude of a transgender Ryan Leaf, Mr. Wentz...
Given the choice between the two of you...
I’d take the transgender Ryan Leaf


You’re a frail one, Mr. Wentz
Your knee is mangled junk
Your arm is flimsy rubber
Your mind is in a funk, Mr. Wentz...
The three words that now best describe Eagles fans
Are as follows and I quote...
“Drink, drank, drunk!”


You’re a weakling, Mr. Wentz
You’re the king of worthless stats
Your team’s a wasted trainwreck full of whiny spoiled brats, Mr. Wentz...
Your fan base is an appalling dump heap,
Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,
And did I mention...phenomenal asshats


You nauseate me, Mr. Wentz
With a Philly Special stench
You make viewers switch to soccer
And should’ve long been on the bench, Mr. Wentz...
You’re a limburger cheesesteak and shit sandwich...with extra-weak sauce!

 

[sonnyblack65]

I thought coming up with the transgender Ryan Leaf was my favorite.

That and You’re a limburger cheesesteak and shit sandwich...with extra-weak sauce!

 

[Inquisitor95]

Merry Christmas bump!

 

[520GGATO]

Is PE1 his dog?

 

[Manster7588]

Is PE1 his mutt?

FIFY

 

[boogiewithstu2007]

It's been a long time since I've written any parodies, other than a few lines here and there. I've been lacking time and inspiration. But thanks to certain posters in a certain thread, I've found inspiration. And once I got going, it was like it wrote itself in no time. So without further ado, I present to you my latest creation.


You’re a lame one, Mr. Wentz
You're really athletic kitsch
You’re as fragile as a flower
You’re as brittle as a bitch, Mr. Wentz...
You’re a pair of moldy underwear with a painful rectal itch


You disappoint us, Mr. Wentz
You’re running out of tricks
Your hair is way too ginger
Your legs are like two sticks, Mr. Wentz...
I wouldn’t draft you if I had thirty-nine and a half first-round picks


You’re a quitter, Mr. Wentz
You give your fans such grief
You have the testicular fortitude of a transgender Ryan Leaf, Mr. Wentz...
Given the choice between the two of you...
I’d take the transgender Ryan Leaf


You’re a frail one, Mr. Wentz
Your knee is mangled junk
Your arm is flimsy rubber
Your mind is in a funk, Mr. Wentz...
The three words that now best describe Eagles fans
Are as follows and I quote...
“Drink, drank, drunk!”


You’re a weakling, Mr. Wentz
You’re the king of worthless stats
Your team’s a wasted trainwreck full of whiny spoiled brats, Mr. Wentz...
Your fan base is an appalling dump heap,
Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,
And did I mention...phenomenal asshats


You nauseate me, Mr. Wentz
With a Philly Special stench
You make viewers switch to soccer
And should’ve long been on the bench, Mr. Wentz...
You’re a limburger cheesesteak and shit sandwich...with extra-weak sauce!

LMAO!! I played the song in my head with Thurl Ravenscroft's voice..

 

[520GGATO]

FIFY

 

[Rex Racer]

It's been a long time since I've written any parodies

You'd have done well to keep the streak alive....................

 

[dbldwn711]

If Wentz was a horse he’d have been shot by now!

Merry Christmas all!