Whats the dumbest rock bottom someone could hit?

[jarntt]

You never know what kind of dumb ideas you'll come up with when you're all fucked up.

Back in the day when I was living with my parents, one night I got all kinds of fucked up, and I assure you, my fucked up is UP. Probably what you consider fucked up, I consider Tuesday. Anyway, I remembered that my moms told me that the cleaning lady was coming in the morning.

I didn't want my presence to preclude her from cleaning my room, so I slept in... my closet. I could have easily gone down to the basement and slept on the couch, which would have not looked strange and been much easier to explain, but NO, I picked the closet.

Well, the cleaning lady opened the closet door so she could vacuum in there and screamed. Good times. . .

If you were capable of remembering that the cleaning lady was coming and were able to process that your presence could preclude her from cleaning your room and you consider that fucked up, you have no clue what fucked up is

 

[SlinkyRedfoot]

If you were capable of remembering that the cleaning lady was coming and were able to process that your presence could preclude her from cleaning your room and you consider that fucked up, you have no clue what fucked up is

Reasonable assumption, but false.

I'm a pro, son. I've got an auto-pilot feature, it just glitches sometimes.

 

[CaptainStubing]

wait, when did wolverine come back?

 

[Wolverine830872]

wait, when did wolverine come back?

when did I come back? when did you come back?

 

[PhoenixEagles1]

If you were capable of remembering that the cleaning lady was coming and were able to process that your presence could preclude her from cleaning your room and you consider that fucked up, you have no clue what fucked up is

I don’t drink but when I did I remember waking up the next morning, not remembering shit from the night before with my keys in the front door, the door wide open and half my body in the house and the other half out the front door on the porch. I literally opened the door and laid down right there.

 

[SJ76]

 

[jarntt]

I don’t drink but when I did I remember waking up the next morning, not remembering shit from the night before with my keys in the front door, the door wide open and half my body in the house and the other half out the front door on the porch. I literally opened the door and laid down right there.

And I bet you didn't even know whether you had a maid or not at that point let alone being aware enough to be courteous to her

 

[PhoenixEagles1]

And I bet you didn't even know whether you had a maid or not at that point let alone being aware enough to be courteous to her

A maid? I wish. But if I did I would have expected them to throw me in the trash for that level of stupidity

 

[jarntt]

A maid? I wish. But if I did I would have expected them to throw me in the trash for that level of stupidity

I think you missed the conversation...

 

[PhoenixEagles1]

I think you missed the conversation...

No, I got your joke with the other guys maid. Just reflecting on my days in Philly and the only maid any of us knew were our Moms... who was also the bread winner, your Mom and Dad, disciplinarian. They were EVERYTHING!

 

[Thruthefog]

 

[Edonidd]

I don’t drink but when I did I remember waking up the next morning, not remembering shit from the night before with my keys in the front door, the door wide open and half my body in the house and the other half out the front door on the porch. I literally opened the door and laid down right there.

I have also mostly quit drinking, but back when I did I once got a ride to an afterparty (before cell phones) and decided it sucked so I grabbed some "pocket beers" and walked home. About 4 hours later I had went through the 4 pocket beers I had grabbed and it was getting light. I had walked 15+ miles and was literally less than 1 mile from my own bed. But I remember this last conscious thought; "I bet sleeping in that field isn't that bad. Birds sleep in the fields. Deer sleep in fields. It can't be that bad." So I didn't pass out I walked 50 yards away from the road and laid down in the middle of a fucking field in Mt Pleasant Mi.

Woke up around 3-4 hours later like wtf....?

 

[handicappers]

Whats the dumbest rock bottom someone could hit?

Top 4 in DBOY contest?

 

[handicappers]

Bookmarked

Will revisit this thread the first time he knocks your QB into the dirt and rearranges his constitution.

 

[Sharkonabicycle]

Myself... about 8-9 years ago.

Went to turn on the television to watch football and no signal. Nothing... Called Comcast all the while screaming "AGENT, REPRESENTATIVE, AGENT" on their automated system... finally got put through. Transcript went along the lines of:

Agent: "Did you check all connections and make sure you have power and the cables are plugged in?"
Me: "YES, I checked everything! This is ridiculous I need someone out here now!"
Agent: "Okay apologies sir, we're not reporting an outage but our earliest available is Tuesday (was a Sunday)."
Me: "Fine, that works, but am upset about this."
Agent: "We understand sir, thank you."

Guy comes out on Tuesday. I answer the door, "Hey." "Hey, I show connectivity to your unit, let's check out the box." "Yah something is up with it, not sure what's going on."

*tech slightly lifts box up, Co-Ax cable falls off.* At this point I get that sinking feeling after a girl tells you your penis is sm- ermm, too big, and he screws it back in. Cable comes back on without issue.

I apologized and he said, "Oh don't worry, happens all the time." and at that point I knew for Cable Company reporting purposes, I was basically the person in the population diagnosed with HIV... like you have to use extreme caution when this person calls or makes contact. He couldn't even look me in the eye as he left.

 

[handicappers]

Maids are awesome.

 

[Godstree]

Dude has serious mental problems. I would not want him in my team's locker room.

Sooner or later, something will set him off again.

Yeah I have a feeling this is going to be a wacked out thrill ride.

 

[pachyderm]

Josh Hamilton indicted for injury to a child

 

[Godstree]

I have also mostly quit drinking, but back when I did I once got a ride to an afterparty (before cell phones) and decided it sucked so I grabbed some "pocket beers" and walked home. About 4 hours later I had went through the 4 pocket beers I had grabbed and it was getting light. I had walked 15+ miles and was literally less than 1 mile from my own bed. But I remember this last conscious thought; "I bet sleeping in that field isn't that bad. Birds sleep in the fields. Deer sleep in fields. It can't be that bad." So I didn't pass out I walked 50 yards away from the road and laid down in the middle of a fucking field in Mt Pleasant Mi.

Woke up around 3-4 hours later like wtf....?

So......my best friend went to Central and he has some wild ass stories about Mt. Pleasant. It is a wonder he made it out alive.

 

[RobToxin]

Dude has serious mental problems. I would not want him in my team's locker room.

Sooner or later, something will set him off again.

Yeah I wouldn't want him in my locker room either but unfortunately the mental patient owns the team.....

Oh, you meant Aldon Smith. Not Jerry Jones.

My bad....