OT: Things we find freaking neat but no place to post

[forty_three]

 

[dash]

Won't someone think of the kids? A sign outside a pre-school in Auburn, California...

 

[Slimpikins]

Oh shit, I dated a girl in Auburn when I was in high school. It is about 20 minutes from where I grew up. Bunch of hicks and stoners up there, which would explain the sign...

 

[thedddd]

Yahoo!

I guess the study group never been to Atlanta?

 

[dash]

The office of the head coach of the Oregon Ducks football team:

 

[Eddie_Shack]

Where does he hide the scotch?

 

[Nasty_Magician]

Where does he hide the scotch?

Or the hookers and free cars?

 

[dare2be]

Or the hookers and free cars?

Or the salami? Oh, you did mention hookers.

 

[dare2be]

The office of the head coach of the Oregon Ducks football team:

There's much, much more:

Photo Gallery: Football Performance Center - GoDucks.com - The University of Oregon Official Athletics Web Site

 

[thedddd]

Funny I see that picture of his office and not sure why but I think of the office from the TV show Coach. Not his college office but the one when he was the pro coach...Yeah I watched the show then.

 

[Comeds]

Funny I see that picture of his office and not sure why but I think of the office from the TV show Coach. Not his college office but the one when he was the pro coach...Yeah I watched the show then.

Orlando Breakers fan? Yeah I watched it too....

 

[mattola]

SCREW your Picanic Basket.... BOOBOO WE GUNNA EAT WELL TONIGHT

 

[xalbox]

SCREW your Picanic Basket.... BOOBOO WE GUNNA EAT WELL TONIGHT

He's just taking out the trash

 

[xalbox]

Insane videos including Axe Cop

Animation Domination High-Def

 

[dash]

Never have been a big fan of RUSH, but this is awesome...

Legendary Canadian rockers Rush raised $575,000 for flood relief at a benefit concert in Red Deer | Alberta | News | Calgary Sun

 

[puckhead]

 

[Winged_Wheel88]

 

[mattola]

TOO FUNNY NOT TO PASS ON!!
How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?

These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
_______________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
_________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget..
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________________________________

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ.
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid
____________________________________________

ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death..
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
___________________________________________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral...
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?

______________________________________
And last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

 

[Eddie_Shack]

That's some funny shit...

 

[Winged_Wheel88]

That's some funny shit...