OT: Bullshitting at the Barbershop

[jstewismybastardson]

Is it socially responsible for this thread to be open during the pandemic?

could rebrand the thread to apeshitting at the zoo ?

 

[Comeds]

Something I'm working on....
Title Card- “Paramount Pictures

Presents”

Exterior – International Space Station

Text Overlay – “International Space Station

(Outer Space)”

Interior – International Space Station Russian Wing

Three cosmonauts are busy looking into separate screens. A photo of Putin punching a bear looks down. Cosmonaut 1 chuckles as he watches US election results change confusing the pundits.

Cosmonaut 1 – “Silly Americans, from space we can easily hack your elections!”

Cosmonaut 2 laughs at screen as he pushes button that has thousands of bots on various social media sites claim that Weird Al Yankovic is a communist. The screen shows Weird Al and his accordion being hauled away by Homeland Security.

Cosmonaut 2 – “Ha ha, who is fat now Weird Al?”

Cosmonaut 3 wipes his eyes as he watches Jon Snow stab Daenerys.

Cosmonaut 3 – “She will always be my queen too”

Cosmonaut 3 sensing Cosmonaut 2 getting closer quickly turns off TV and types in command shutting **** Hub down.

Cosmonaut 3 - “Enjoy going back to **** magazines America!”

Exterior – A space capsule is docking on the Space Station. On its side are the words: “Undercover Space Pizza – 30 Days or Less or Its Free!”

Interior

There is a knock on the Space Station door, all three cosmonauts look confused. Putin and the bear look confused too.

Cosmonaut 1 – “Who is it?”

Pizza Delivery Man through hatch – “Pizza!”

Cosmonaut 3 – “We didn’t order pizza!”

Pizza Delivery Man – “Compliments of Kim Jong Un, death to America!”

The cosmonauts excitedly open the hatch – when they do a fist knocks one back. A fight ensues. At one point a cosmonaut sprays vodka onto the helmet of Pizza Delivery Man blinding him. Tiny windshield wipers extend from helmet and intermittently wipe the helmet clean. Cosmonaut 3 gets punched into the light switch, the lights go out. When the lights turn back on the three cosmonauts are tied together floating in the middle of the room. Pizza Delivery Man is heading back to his capsule.

Cosmonaut 2 – “Wait, who are you?”

Pizza Delivery Man turns, open his helmet exposing his face.

Pizza Delivery Man – “I'm lieutenant Frank Drebin, Space Force!”

Vodka bubble floats into Drebin’s nose making him wildly cough.



Title Sequence.

Two plus years after Space Force was announced, I still think its stupid enough sounding that it sounds like a Naked Gun parody.

I wonder if OJ is available....

 

[Comeds]

could rebrand the thread to apeshitting at the zoo ?

Striiiiiike!

 

[jstewismybastardson]

Striiiiiike!

high heat that was still hot !


/ewwwwwwwwwwwww

 

[Comeds]

Antifa is coming for the Columbo statue next!

 

[jstewismybastardson]

 

[Comeds]

Nailed it!

 

[puckhead]

 

[jstewismybastardson]

I saw Caillou was trending and knew for sure where this was going after seeing the gop dipshits crying that paw patrol was being cancelled lol

there are some gems out there lol

 

[forty_three]

Jungle Jack Hanna announces retirement from Columbus Zoo and Aquarium

In other "awesome and qualified people in Ohio quitting their jobs" news.

 

[dash]

Not even Peanuts is safe these days - Look what they've done to poor Franklin.

 

[thedddd]

 

[forty_three]

US Olympic boxer Virginia Fuchs cleared of doping violation caused by sex | Daily Mail Online

 

[Comeds]

Something I'm working on....
Title Card- “Paramount Pictures

Presents”

Exterior – International Space Station

Text Overlay – “International Space Station

(Outer Space)”

Interior – International Space Station Russian Wing

Three cosmonauts are busy looking into separate screens. A photo of Putin punching a bear looks down. Cosmonaut 1 chuckles as he watches US election results change confusing the pundits.

Cosmonaut 1 – “Silly Americans, from space we can easily hack your elections!”

Cosmonaut 2 laughs at screen as he pushes button that has thousands of bots on various social media sites claim that Weird Al Yankovic is a communist. The screen shows Weird Al and his accordion being hauled away by Homeland Security.

Cosmonaut 2 – “Ha ha, who is fat now Weird Al?”

Cosmonaut 3 wipes his eyes as he watches Jon Snow stab Daenerys.

Cosmonaut 3 – “She will always be my queen too”

Cosmonaut 3 sensing Cosmonaut 2 getting closer quickly turns off TV and types in command shutting **** Hub down.

Cosmonaut 3 - “Enjoy going back to **** magazines America!”

Exterior – A space capsule is docking on the Space Station. On its side are the words: “Undercover Space Pizza – 30 Days or Less or Its Free!”

Interior

There is a knock on the Space Station door, all three cosmonauts look confused. Putin and the bear look confused too.

Cosmonaut 1 – “Who is it?”

Pizza Delivery Man through hatch – “Pizza!”

Cosmonaut 3 – “We didn’t order pizza!”

Pizza Delivery Man – “Compliments of Kim Jong Un, death to America!”

The cosmonauts excitedly open the hatch – when they do a fist knocks one back. A fight ensues. At one point a cosmonaut sprays vodka onto the helmet of Pizza Delivery Man blinding him. Tiny windshield wipers extend from helmet and intermittently wipe the helmet clean. Cosmonaut 3 gets punched into the light switch, the lights go out. When the lights turn back on the three cosmonauts are tied together floating in the middle of the room. Pizza Delivery Man is heading back to his capsule.

Cosmonaut 2 – “Wait, who are you?”

Pizza Delivery Man turns, open his helmet exposing his face.

Pizza Delivery Man – “I'm lieutenant Frank Drebin, Space Force!”

Vodka bubble floats into Drebin’s nose making him wildly cough.



Title Sequence.

Well I worked on this at work Tuesday and Wednesday and it was the most important work I have done all week. I guess I'll spend the work afternoon rewriting the lyrics to "I Love LA" the "I Love The Moon" for the climatic moon buggy chase.

Now who to play Frank Drebin....

 

[puckhead]

The Flaming Lips smash out social distancing gig with crowd and band in giant plastic bubbles

 

[mooger_35]

The Flaming Lips smash out social distancing gig with crowd and band in giant plastic bubbles

any Spinal Tap reference for the win!

 

[Comeds]

It's amazing how things change over time.

In my teens I masturbated with soap because it was stressed to me how important hygiene is..
In my 20s I masturbated with sunscreen because skin cancer was a big fear at the time.
In my 30s I masturbated with fish oil because I was concerned about my heart and cardiovascular health.
Now in my 40s I'm masturbating with hand sanitizer because there is always some illness going around.
Wonder what my 50s (5 months away ) will bring

 

[puckhead]

Wonder what my 50s (5 months away ) will bring

My father always said that I would learn to appreciate a good scotch as I got older.
Wonder if this is what he meant?

 

[thedddd]

It's amazing how things change over time.

In my teens I masturbated with soap because it was stressed to me how important hygiene is..
In my 20s I masturbated with sunscreen because skin cancer was a big fear at the time.
In my 30s I masturbated with fish oil because I was concerned about my heart and cardiovascular health.
Now in my 40s I'm masturbating with hand sanitizer because there is always some illness going around.
Wonder what my 50s (5 months away ) will bring

Bengay

 

[thedddd]

RIP....Roddy