OT: Joke thread

[HonusWagner66]

Q: What do you call the Toronto Maple Leafs winning the Stanley Cup post-expansion?
A: A figment of your imagination

(Insert any other team that hasn't won the Cup since 1967 if you like.)

 

[DerringerEagle]

Q: What do you call the Toronto Maple Leafs winning the Stanley Cup post-expansion?
A: A figment of your imagination

(Insert any other team that hasn't won the Cup since 1967 if you like.)

Its just too bad the Leafs haven't been pitiful enough to lose their way into amazing draft picks like some other teams.

 

[Forty_Sixand2]

^THESE TWO^

 

[Darkstone42]

Its just too bad the Leafs haven't been pitiful enough to lose their way into amazing draft picks like some other teams.

I don't get it. What's the punch line?


=)

 

[Darkstone42]

Here you go:

[YOUTUBE]bn1-M5Ze0p8[/YOUTUBE]

 

[TOX1]

I don't get it. What's the punch line?


=)

DE doesn't have a "punch line"...all he seems to have is a Pen's slam in his repertoire.

 

[Darkstone42]

DE doesn't have a "punch line"...all he seems to have is a Pen's slam in his repertoire.

Well, I could have been that direct, but I chose a more subtle path, marked appropriately with my favorite of all smileys. You know, get him thinking.

=)

 

[filosofy29]

Derringer Eagle posting here?

;-)~

Ok, what do I win?

 

[TOX1]

Well, I could have been that direct, but I chose a more subtle path, marked appropriately with my favorite of all smileys. You know, get him thinking.

=)

I tried subtle one time, but I threw up.

 

[TOX1]

Derringer Eagle posting here?

;-)~

Ok, what do I win?

You win an autographed (signed by me) copy of Zeppelin's 4th album!!!!

 

[filosofy29]

You win an autographed (signed by me) copy of Zeppelin's 4th album!!!!

LOL, I'm gonna hold you to that Tox ;-)

 

[puckhead]

I don't get it. What's the punch line?

Hall / Seguin in a Bruins uniform.

here's one....

 

[Winged_Wheel88]

What's purple, weighs 5,000 pounds and lives at the bottom of the ocean?














Moby Grape.

 

[bonham]

You win an autographed (signed by me) copy of Zeppelin's 4th album!!!!

best album!

 

[wings-pens2166]

It's big brother's birthday today...he's turning 10. he says, "i'm ten. I'm a man now. I think I'll swear. That's what men do. we swear. I'm gonna say damn."

well little brother, who worships big brother says, "I want to be a man too. I want to swear too." so big brother says "okay, you can say ass."

so having that decided, they head downstairs for breakfast. mom says to big brother, "what do you want for breakfast?"

big brother: I want some damn cornflakes.

mom: what did you just say?

BB: I want some damn cornflakes.

POW, back of the hand right across the mouth. BB is crying hard. mom looks at little brother and says (very angrily), "what do you want for breakfast?"

LB (looking at BB crying in pain), "I don't know, but you can bet your ass it isn't cornflakes."

 

[flyersfan4706]

Joe and Dave are hunting when Dave keels over. Frantic, Joe dials 911 on his cell phone and blurts, "My friend just dropped dead! What should I do?"
A soothing voice at the other end says, "Don't worry, I can help. First, let's make sure he's really dead."
After a brief silence, the operator hears a shot. Then Joe comes back to the phone. "Okay," he says nervously to the operator. "What do I do next?"

 

[Bizzle McDizzle]

wow

 

[Eddie_Shack]

Q: Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?

A: Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away.

 

[IPostedWhat]

Q: What do you call an unbiased Penguins fan?
A: A figment of your imagination

LOL @ DE

 

[Eddie_Shack]

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"