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My my... what a difference a month makes.
On September 21st this team needed 3OT's, a blocked FG and a 55 gallon drum of pure LUCK to put away Marshall.
30 days later, the powers that be have deemed us the 14th-best team in the whole GD country. Wow. Not only that, a schedule that seemed to be getting increasingly more difficult at the absolute worst time (@GT, vs. UNC, right after the Marshall fiasco), now seems to be barren of competition save one (@ #7 Miami) or two games (@ BC?), and a possible berth in the ACCCG.
Dare we dream that impossible, improbable dream? Is there still a glimmer of hope that we could play in the BCS title game? Would the CFB Gods allow it? Can we sneak in the backdoor and play in the greatest game of all?
Hahaha… probably not.
But, fuck it. Dreaming the dream is what CFB is all about. This is what makes loss #2 the “The Day the Dream ended” game. Dream it ya fucking dreamers, and write this down.
This. Could. Happen.
No, not because we're good... we’re not. Far from it. Not because we deserve it... ha, see aforementioned Marshall and our inability to score or put inferior teams away. Nay. I say we dare to dream because we have the only respectable record left by just falling forward the rest of the way. Look at the teams ahead of us and look at their remaining schedules. Of the 13 teams ahead of us, all 13 either play each other, or would likely play another top-13 team in a Conference Championship game. Better yet… let ME look at their remaining schedules for you, starting with #13... ya lazy, dreaming fucks.
#13 LSU (6-2) - Games vs. Top-13 Opponents (soon to be abbreviated as GvT13) @ Bama - Nov. 9. If LSU somehow figures out a way to beat Bama, they'll probably play another GvT13 in #5 Missouri in the SEC CG. If they don't, VT is sure to be ranked ahead of a 3-loss anyone, even a team from #Godsconference.
#12 UCLA (5-1) - GvT13: @ #2 Oregon - This weekend. As luck would have it, the top of the PAC-12 South has to play the top of the PAC-12 North WAY before the PAC-12 CG. Something's got to give. Even if UCLA loses this game, they've got a great chance at a rematch as they control their destiny and have to play division co-leader, Arizona State, at home in late November. Root for UCLA in the upset and then root for revenge in the PAC-12 CG.
#11 Auburn (6-1) - GvT13: vs. Bama, Nov. 30. Their lone loss was to LSU, so it would be a big help if they lost once (vs. Georgia, Nov. 16) or twice (@ Tenn, Nov. 9) before then, just so they ruin both of their SOS’s and prospects before the last game of the regular season vs. the Tide. If they manage the improbable and run the table, they’d still face a tough game (probably a GvT13) in #5 Missou in SEC CG.
#10 Texas Tech (7-0) - GvT13: vs. #8 Baylor - Nov. 16. Kliff Kingsbury (who is a deadspin favorite, who’ve anointed him to be the Swaggiest Bro Coach who ever Swagged) has helped the Red Raiders forget all about Mike Leech and the "system QBs" of the early 00’s... by becoming a dochey version of Mike Leech with all new system QB’s. They're undefeated and, unlike our friends in the PAC-12, SEC and B1G, won’t play themselves into a GvT13 in a CG as they play in the "BIG" XII... that only has 10 teams. They didn't exactly destroy a 3-4 WVU team this past weekend, and Baylor is going to break the scoreboard against them. Outside of that match-up, they've got VERY tough games on the schedule, starting this weekend @ #15 OK (a possible threat to jump us if they beat TTech) and next weekend vs. #19 OKSt. Chances are somebody gives them a loss or two.
#9 Klempson (6-1) - GvT13: None. But man, did they get mushroom stamped on live, prime-time television. FSU used them like a blow-up doll at their house. I hope Dabo and Tigers can do some good work with the r*pe counselors this week, get back to business, and keep everyone’s SOS up. With that big, sloppy, football-facial-of-a-loss on their resume, there's no chance that Klempson would end the season ranked ahead of a VT team that ran the table. Even if FSU somehow trips over their own dick in their remaining conference games, Klempson would play us in the ACCCG if our everything-coming-up-Millhouse-and-Tech perfect scenario came to pass. Non-factor here.
#8 Baylor (6-0) - GvT13: Aforementioned match-up vs. #10 Texas Tech, Nov 16. These guys are good. They’re a lot like we were in ’99 (in an AQ conference, won it before but not getting a lot of respect…) but scoring about 30 more points-per-game. Baylor has been destroying teams. They've scored 69 or more save one game (only managed 35 @ KSU). They've got three, maybe four, NFL-ready WRs who are just making secondaries look stupid. They've faced so-so competition, but you can't score this many points without being pretty GD good. The schedule gets pretty rough starting right about now. Just like TT, they have to play vs. #15 OK (Nov 7) and @ #19 OKSt (Nov 23) and those tough games are the bread around the meaty TT match-up on Nov. 16 (which will probably the Over off... unless Vegas wants to set it at 110 and lose... big time). They play their toughest remaining games back-to-back-to-back. Ouch. If they can survive that, they get to play @ TCU and vs. Texas as a reward. Ouch again. I still think they can do it, and, if they did, they would be a real problem in the improbable dream scenario.
#7 Miami (6-0) - GvT13: @ #2 FSU, Nov. 2. This has to be the most overrated team in the top-13. How in the holy hell are they ranked in the top-10? If the UNC Thursday Turnover-a-thon pillow fight was any indication, I am expecting the Canes to get exposed by FSU the week before they play us. I think a best-case scenario would have them beating FSU, and still high off of their own swag, somehow ranked in the top-5 (if not top-3) when they play us. Either way, we play them, so we control what happens with them… so fuck these guys.
#6 Stanford (6-1) - GvT13: vs. #3 Oregon, Nov. 7. Be sure to keep Washington on your Xmas card list. Stanford is in the top-heavy PAC-12 North along with Oregon and #25 ORSt, the latter they play this weekend. If they manage to win those games, they’ll probably get a rematch with their most recent dispatched foe, #12 UCLA. If they did, they'd be tough to keep out of the title game. They also have @ USC and vs. ND on the schedule, which would’ve sounded impressive in the early 00’s. Hoping the Beavers cover and smother these nerds this weekend.
#5 Missouri (7-0) - GvT13: None. Like Klempson, a team that doesn't have a top-13’er left on the schedule. They’re running though #Godsconference though, which I'm pretty sure wasn't supposed to happen. If they make it through their remaining schedule (which is tough, vs. reeling, Connor-Shaw-less, #21 USC, vs. Tenn and vs. #16 TAMU) they would play themselves into a GvT13 vs. one of Bama, Auburn or LSU. They first need to dispatch USC, the only legit threat to their SECCG berth. I'm wondering if they're just playing beyond themselves, or if #Godsconference is getting a little exposed by success of their newest members. Go THESE Tigers… but I expect they’ll exit the top-10, maybe top-15, before Thanksgiving.
#4 tOSU (7-0) - GvT13: None... and will most likely have none in any scenario. Ohio State only has #22 Michigan to contend with the rest of the way. If they run through their somehow-looking-weaker-than-the-ACC B1G regular season schedule, they'll probably play Michigan again, or (unranked and unloved 6-1) Michigan State or #24 Nebraska. All they need to do is win against team they’re supposed to beat and hope the SEC, PAC-12 and (amazingly) ACC all eat each other. Which is likely. We'd need some help with these guys from an unlikely place if we're going to jump them. Go Illini?
#3 Oregon (7-0) - GvT13: vs. #12 UCLA, this Saturday; @ #6 Stanford, Nov 7. The next two weeks will tell the tale. If they get past those teams, they've got #25 ORSt at home before a possible rematch with UCLA in the PAC-12 CG. We'll have to wait and see. They'll likely have to lose twice for us to jump them, and I don’t see that happening. Is the NCAA supposed to sanction them soon? Like, by November?
#2 FSU (6-0) - GvT13: vs. #7 Miami, Nov. 2. Wait… WTF? Three ACC teams in the top-13 of the BCS? #Godsconferece must be #furious. Wow… they looked pretty good last Saturday. They get to play a very easy schedule, given my own personal assessment of #7 Miami, going into the ACCCG. That's fine. If they get there, well... you got to beat the man, to be the man, and all the better for us and SOS. We'd have our BCS destiny in our hands, and they would probably stay around #2 or #3 if they ran the table, so it would be the perfect play-in game and fresh on pollsters’ minds.
#1 Alabama (7-0) - GvT13: vs. #13 LSU, Nov. 9; @ #11 Auburn, Nov. 30th. Pretty much the same scenario as those two teams as well. If they win their games, they'll likely get to play one more GvT13 in the form of #5 Missouri. We'd need them to have two, maybe even three loses to jump them. Sigh... if only we didn't shit ourselves so completely on Special Teams... that 35-10 loss looks much worse than it was and will kill us if we have similar records when all is said and done.
So... now what?
Oh right. The most important part of any dream-the-impossible-dream scenario, and perhaps the least likely to happen... WE NEED TO RUN THE FUCKING TABLE. Can that even be done? A month ago I would punched you in the face and kicked you in the balls if you had come to me with this post.
But now... BC? Miami? Why the fuck not?
Dream it ya fucking dreamers.
On September 21st this team needed 3OT's, a blocked FG and a 55 gallon drum of pure LUCK to put away Marshall.
30 days later, the powers that be have deemed us the 14th-best team in the whole GD country. Wow. Not only that, a schedule that seemed to be getting increasingly more difficult at the absolute worst time (@GT, vs. UNC, right after the Marshall fiasco), now seems to be barren of competition save one (@ #7 Miami) or two games (@ BC?), and a possible berth in the ACCCG.
Dare we dream that impossible, improbable dream? Is there still a glimmer of hope that we could play in the BCS title game? Would the CFB Gods allow it? Can we sneak in the backdoor and play in the greatest game of all?
Hahaha… probably not.
But, fuck it. Dreaming the dream is what CFB is all about. This is what makes loss #2 the “The Day the Dream ended” game. Dream it ya fucking dreamers, and write this down.
This. Could. Happen.
No, not because we're good... we’re not. Far from it. Not because we deserve it... ha, see aforementioned Marshall and our inability to score or put inferior teams away. Nay. I say we dare to dream because we have the only respectable record left by just falling forward the rest of the way. Look at the teams ahead of us and look at their remaining schedules. Of the 13 teams ahead of us, all 13 either play each other, or would likely play another top-13 team in a Conference Championship game. Better yet… let ME look at their remaining schedules for you, starting with #13... ya lazy, dreaming fucks.
#13 LSU (6-2) - Games vs. Top-13 Opponents (soon to be abbreviated as GvT13) @ Bama - Nov. 9. If LSU somehow figures out a way to beat Bama, they'll probably play another GvT13 in #5 Missouri in the SEC CG. If they don't, VT is sure to be ranked ahead of a 3-loss anyone, even a team from #Godsconference.
#12 UCLA (5-1) - GvT13: @ #2 Oregon - This weekend. As luck would have it, the top of the PAC-12 South has to play the top of the PAC-12 North WAY before the PAC-12 CG. Something's got to give. Even if UCLA loses this game, they've got a great chance at a rematch as they control their destiny and have to play division co-leader, Arizona State, at home in late November. Root for UCLA in the upset and then root for revenge in the PAC-12 CG.
#11 Auburn (6-1) - GvT13: vs. Bama, Nov. 30. Their lone loss was to LSU, so it would be a big help if they lost once (vs. Georgia, Nov. 16) or twice (@ Tenn, Nov. 9) before then, just so they ruin both of their SOS’s and prospects before the last game of the regular season vs. the Tide. If they manage the improbable and run the table, they’d still face a tough game (probably a GvT13) in #5 Missou in SEC CG.
#10 Texas Tech (7-0) - GvT13: vs. #8 Baylor - Nov. 16. Kliff Kingsbury (who is a deadspin favorite, who’ve anointed him to be the Swaggiest Bro Coach who ever Swagged) has helped the Red Raiders forget all about Mike Leech and the "system QBs" of the early 00’s... by becoming a dochey version of Mike Leech with all new system QB’s. They're undefeated and, unlike our friends in the PAC-12, SEC and B1G, won’t play themselves into a GvT13 in a CG as they play in the "BIG" XII... that only has 10 teams. They didn't exactly destroy a 3-4 WVU team this past weekend, and Baylor is going to break the scoreboard against them. Outside of that match-up, they've got VERY tough games on the schedule, starting this weekend @ #15 OK (a possible threat to jump us if they beat TTech) and next weekend vs. #19 OKSt. Chances are somebody gives them a loss or two.
#9 Klempson (6-1) - GvT13: None. But man, did they get mushroom stamped on live, prime-time television. FSU used them like a blow-up doll at their house. I hope Dabo and Tigers can do some good work with the r*pe counselors this week, get back to business, and keep everyone’s SOS up. With that big, sloppy, football-facial-of-a-loss on their resume, there's no chance that Klempson would end the season ranked ahead of a VT team that ran the table. Even if FSU somehow trips over their own dick in their remaining conference games, Klempson would play us in the ACCCG if our everything-coming-up-Millhouse-and-Tech perfect scenario came to pass. Non-factor here.
#8 Baylor (6-0) - GvT13: Aforementioned match-up vs. #10 Texas Tech, Nov 16. These guys are good. They’re a lot like we were in ’99 (in an AQ conference, won it before but not getting a lot of respect…) but scoring about 30 more points-per-game. Baylor has been destroying teams. They've scored 69 or more save one game (only managed 35 @ KSU). They've got three, maybe four, NFL-ready WRs who are just making secondaries look stupid. They've faced so-so competition, but you can't score this many points without being pretty GD good. The schedule gets pretty rough starting right about now. Just like TT, they have to play vs. #15 OK (Nov 7) and @ #19 OKSt (Nov 23) and those tough games are the bread around the meaty TT match-up on Nov. 16 (which will probably the Over off... unless Vegas wants to set it at 110 and lose... big time). They play their toughest remaining games back-to-back-to-back. Ouch. If they can survive that, they get to play @ TCU and vs. Texas as a reward. Ouch again. I still think they can do it, and, if they did, they would be a real problem in the improbable dream scenario.
#7 Miami (6-0) - GvT13: @ #2 FSU, Nov. 2. This has to be the most overrated team in the top-13. How in the holy hell are they ranked in the top-10? If the UNC Thursday Turnover-a-thon pillow fight was any indication, I am expecting the Canes to get exposed by FSU the week before they play us. I think a best-case scenario would have them beating FSU, and still high off of their own swag, somehow ranked in the top-5 (if not top-3) when they play us. Either way, we play them, so we control what happens with them… so fuck these guys.
#6 Stanford (6-1) - GvT13: vs. #3 Oregon, Nov. 7. Be sure to keep Washington on your Xmas card list. Stanford is in the top-heavy PAC-12 North along with Oregon and #25 ORSt, the latter they play this weekend. If they manage to win those games, they’ll probably get a rematch with their most recent dispatched foe, #12 UCLA. If they did, they'd be tough to keep out of the title game. They also have @ USC and vs. ND on the schedule, which would’ve sounded impressive in the early 00’s. Hoping the Beavers cover and smother these nerds this weekend.
#5 Missouri (7-0) - GvT13: None. Like Klempson, a team that doesn't have a top-13’er left on the schedule. They’re running though #Godsconference though, which I'm pretty sure wasn't supposed to happen. If they make it through their remaining schedule (which is tough, vs. reeling, Connor-Shaw-less, #21 USC, vs. Tenn and vs. #16 TAMU) they would play themselves into a GvT13 vs. one of Bama, Auburn or LSU. They first need to dispatch USC, the only legit threat to their SECCG berth. I'm wondering if they're just playing beyond themselves, or if #Godsconference is getting a little exposed by success of their newest members. Go THESE Tigers… but I expect they’ll exit the top-10, maybe top-15, before Thanksgiving.
#4 tOSU (7-0) - GvT13: None... and will most likely have none in any scenario. Ohio State only has #22 Michigan to contend with the rest of the way. If they run through their somehow-looking-weaker-than-the-ACC B1G regular season schedule, they'll probably play Michigan again, or (unranked and unloved 6-1) Michigan State or #24 Nebraska. All they need to do is win against team they’re supposed to beat and hope the SEC, PAC-12 and (amazingly) ACC all eat each other. Which is likely. We'd need some help with these guys from an unlikely place if we're going to jump them. Go Illini?
#3 Oregon (7-0) - GvT13: vs. #12 UCLA, this Saturday; @ #6 Stanford, Nov 7. The next two weeks will tell the tale. If they get past those teams, they've got #25 ORSt at home before a possible rematch with UCLA in the PAC-12 CG. We'll have to wait and see. They'll likely have to lose twice for us to jump them, and I don’t see that happening. Is the NCAA supposed to sanction them soon? Like, by November?
#2 FSU (6-0) - GvT13: vs. #7 Miami, Nov. 2. Wait… WTF? Three ACC teams in the top-13 of the BCS? #Godsconferece must be #furious. Wow… they looked pretty good last Saturday. They get to play a very easy schedule, given my own personal assessment of #7 Miami, going into the ACCCG. That's fine. If they get there, well... you got to beat the man, to be the man, and all the better for us and SOS. We'd have our BCS destiny in our hands, and they would probably stay around #2 or #3 if they ran the table, so it would be the perfect play-in game and fresh on pollsters’ minds.
#1 Alabama (7-0) - GvT13: vs. #13 LSU, Nov. 9; @ #11 Auburn, Nov. 30th. Pretty much the same scenario as those two teams as well. If they win their games, they'll likely get to play one more GvT13 in the form of #5 Missouri. We'd need them to have two, maybe even three loses to jump them. Sigh... if only we didn't shit ourselves so completely on Special Teams... that 35-10 loss looks much worse than it was and will kill us if we have similar records when all is said and done.
So... now what?
Oh right. The most important part of any dream-the-impossible-dream scenario, and perhaps the least likely to happen... WE NEED TO RUN THE FUCKING TABLE. Can that even be done? A month ago I would punched you in the face and kicked you in the balls if you had come to me with this post.
But now... BC? Miami? Why the fuck not?
Dream it ya fucking dreamers.
