OT - awaz need's a job

[beantownmaniac]

Best of luck Awaz

 

[Comeds]

As someone who has been on both sides of interviews I have to say first impressions have a way of setting up the rest of the interview. That said looking good and feeling confident are a must but the thing that I really notice is the handshake. I personally lose respect for a man that does not have a firm handshake.

Do you measure penises too?

 

[dboy97]

Do you measure penises too?

Ha ha ha why would do that? I'd probably lose oops.

 

[dboy97]

Do you measure penises too?

Rep points for that one.

 

[Dacks]

Good luck.

As for myself, I finally landed a contract (only 45 days though) with the stats division of NRCan (Natural Resources Canada), but I'm writing an exam for StatsCan (figure it out) tonight that could lead to something permanant down the line. Snagging a government job makes you a made man.

I should really be studying right now...

 

[forty_three]

Whatever "brain teaser" question they give you, compliment it and say it's one of the best you've heard. Then hit them with one.

My favorite is "Why are manhole covers round?" The answer is that it's the only shape that can't fall in on itself.

Another one is "You have nine balls. 8 weigh the same, one weighs more. They are otherwise identical. You have one two sided scale. What's the fewest number of weighs required to find the 1 ball that weighs more?"

The answer is 2. Separate the balls into groups of three. Three on one side of the scale, three on the other. One side is heavier, you know the heavy ball is in that group. If they are the same, the heavy ball is in the three you left out. Take the group that contains the heavy ball, put one on each side of the scale, leave one out. Whichever side goes down is your heavy one, if they are the same, the ball left out is the heavy one.

Especially for technical / engineering jobs, hiring managers eat that shit up.

 

[Bizzle McDizzle]

Whatever "brain teaser" question they give you, compliment it and say it's one of the best you've heard. Then hit them with one.

My favorite is "Why are manhole covers round?" The answer is that it's the only shape that can't fall in on itself.

Another one is "You have nine balls. 8 weigh the same, one weighs more. They are otherwise identical. You have one two sided scale. What's the fewest number of weighs required to find the 1 ball that weighs more?"

The answer is 2. Separate the balls into groups of three. Three on one side of the scale, three on the other. One side is heavier, you know the heavy ball is in that group. If they are the same, the heavy ball is in the three you left out. Take the group that contains the heavy ball, put one on each side of the scale, leave one out. Whichever side goes down is your heavy one, if they are the same, the ball left out is the heavy one.

Especially for technical / engineering jobs, hiring managers eat that shit up.

I like to ask applicants.. "what is the sound of one hand clapping"... just to watch them sweat.

 

[NullDefault]

Whenever I interview potential applicants for a position I'm always impressed with a person that has well thought out questions about the position before coming into the interview. It shows that they have a genuine interest not only in what the company expects from them as employees, but also it shows that they want to find out whether or not it is the job for them. Nothing worse than hiring a person and then losing them 6 months later because it doesn't suit their expectations.

In short, my advice is to prepare questions that show that you want to know if the job is a good fit for you.

 

[TOX1]

1. Suit and tie
2. Arrive early
3. Firm handshake
4. Look them in the eye
5. Don't ramble
6. Thank the interviewer(s) for his/her/their time

Good luck!

Co-signed.

If I could add one more thing -- DO NOT {I repeat} DO NOT cologne or body spray yourself into oblivion! The guy doing the interview wants to know everything about your skills, not your smells.

 

[Dacks]

Whatever "brain teaser" question they give you, compliment it and say it's one of the best you've heard. Then hit them with one.

My favorite is "Why are manhole covers round?" The answer is that it's the only shape that can't fall in on itself.

Another one is "You have nine balls. 8 weigh the same, one weighs more. They are otherwise identical. You have one two sided scale. What's the fewest number of weighs required to find the 1 ball that weighs more?"

The answer is 2. Separate the balls into groups of three. Three on one side of the scale, three on the other. One side is heavier, you know the heavy ball is in that group. If they are the same, the heavy ball is in the three you left out. Take the group that contains the heavy ball, put one on each side of the scale, leave one out. Whichever side goes down is your heavy one, if they are the same, the ball left out is the heavy one.

Especially for technical / engineering jobs, hiring managers eat that shit up.

Oh boy, I have a whole list of those. Love 'em. For the marble and scale problem, that's easy. The more advance problem is 12 marbles, one of which is a different weight (you don't know if it's heavier or lighter). You have three uses of the scale, after which you have to declare which marble is the odd one out, and whether or not it's heavier or lighter.

That question was given to the Grade 11 class at my school. Teacher had given them a week to try to solve. I was in Grade 10, took me two hours.

Oh, and the exam tonight went well. Hopefully I make it to the interview stage.

 

[Eddie_Shack]

My favorite is "Why are manhole covers round?" The answer is that it's the only shape that can't fall in on itself.

Wrong, the reason manhole covers are round is because manholes are round.

 

[IPostedWhat]

Wrong, the reason manhole covers are round is because manholes are round.

Wrong! It's so you can play street frisbee.

And lets not forget about reuleaux polygons. They don't fall in on themselves either.

 

[Dacks]

Round manholes also disperse weight more evenly.

Riddle me this: There are 10 candidates for a statscan job. The interviewers come in with guns and say the following:

"When the interview begins, you will be placed randomly in a line, front to back. Each of you will be given a hat, red or blue, assigned randomly. You can see the hats of the people in front of you, but not your hat or the hat of the people behind you. At this point, we will ask each of you to declare your own hat colour, starting with the person at the back of the line and moving forward. If you're correct, you get a job, if not, you'll be shot. If you say anything other than 'red' or 'blue' everyone will be shot. If you look around, everyone will be shot. If you speak out of turn, everyone will be shot."

The candidates then have ten minutes to discuss a strategy to optimize survival for as many candidates as possible.

I don't have the solutions, but I'm pretty sure I have the optimal strategy. Fire away.

 

[IPostedWhat]

Each of you will be given a hat, red or blue, assigned randomly. At this point, we will ask each of you to declare your own hat colour, starting with the person at the back of the line and moving forward

In that case, everyone declares the same color hat.

 

[Dacks]

In that case, everyone declares the same color hat.

With a random hat assignment, that has no guaranteed lives saved, and on average only five lives saved. In other words, an expected value of 5. It's pretty much the worst strategy, since it's the statistical minimum.

I'm sure you can do better.

 

[IPostedWhat]

With a random hat assignment.

It can't be random if you said each person can declare their own hat color however.

 

[Dacks]

It can't be random if you said each person can declare their own hat color however.

Sorry, maybe I should have said 'guess' instead of 'declare'.

The hats are assigned randomly, and the candidates need to try to guess what colour their hat is if they want to live.

 

[Comeds]

Try to rhyme as many answers as you can.

 

[IPostedWhat]

Sorry, maybe I should have said 'guess' instead of 'declare'.

The hats are assigned randomly, and the candidates need to try to guess what colour their hat is if they want to live.

This isn't how you get a job at Disney, is it?

 

[Dacks]

This isn't how you get a job at Disney, is it?

No, that's a written test. 200 to 300 words on which Disney princess you'd want to f*ck and why.

Die Hard 3 is on the TV right now, lot's of good riddles in that movie. Bucket one is the best.