Comedy Platinum out of Toronto - "Canada's Team" quest for the Cup

[Bloody Brian Burke]

Hitchhiking has changed a bit.

 

[Bloody Brian Burke]

Pro-tip: If you have to pull over to sleep because you're entirely too shitfaced to continue on, choose a different parking lot than the HQ of the provincial police service (and also don't have your forged documents with you???).

Toronto driver found sleeping at Ontario police station charged with impaired driving: OPP

An allegedly impaired Toronto driver who was found asleep at the wheel at a police station parking lot north of the city has been charged with impaired driving.

www.cp24.com

 

[dash]

Pro-tip: If you have to pull over to sleep because you're entirely too shitfaced to continue on, choose a different parking lot than the HQ of the provincial police service (and also don't have your forged documents with you???).

Toronto driver found sleeping at Ontario police station charged with impaired driving: OPP

An allegedly impaired Toronto driver who was found asleep at the wheel at a police station parking lot north of the city has been charged with impaired driving.

www.cp24.com

Also, steer clear of any and all Tim Horton's in Brooks, Alberta for a quick catnap after attempting to sleep overnight at the Calgary airport on your way down to Medicine Hat to avoid any RCMP interaction.

/This may or may not be a true story

 

[mattola]

Also, steer clear of any and all Tim Horton's in Brooks, Alberta for a quick catnap after attempting to sleep overnight at the Calgary airport on your way down to Medicine Hat to avoid any RCMP interaction.

/This may or may not be a true story

when I was working at the morgue in Burnaby I used to go for a run before every shift at 5 am at Deer Lake Park. One morning I got there and it was a downpour of rain and I decided to just surf some internet and I fell asleep . I woke up surrounded by 4 police cars I opened my window and they asked for my ID which I gave them and before they let me go I asked why the big presence and it turned out that a convict escaped custody and stole a black GMC truck (just like mine) and I matched his description ....

 

[dash]

 

[puckhead]

Coulda been an email.

 

[Bloody Brian Burke]

 

[forty_three]

Also "Do you know how many Maple Leafs pajamas and bed sheet sets I can buy with what I make? Like I care about a letter. Psh."

 

[forty_three]

When i grow up, I want to write for the Beaverton

Leafs announce that making Matthews captain is the best way to distract fans from fact they haven't made any significant roster changes again

TORONTO - In a press conference scheduled for Wednesday, the Toronto Maple Leafs are expected to announce that, after much deliberation, they believe giving Auston Matthews the captaincy is the best way to get everyone to stop talking about how they're basically running back the same roster that...

www.thebeaverton.com

 

[esls79]

So Pelosi didn’t just stop with Sleepy Joe, she doubled down and got Tavares demoted as well.

Thanks Obama.

 

[dash]

So Pelosi didn’t just stop with Sleepy Joe, she doubled down and got Tavares demoted as well.

Thanks Obama.

I think if we dig deep enough, Nancy Pelosi probably broke up Justin Trudeau's marriage.

 

[mattola]

When i grow up, I want to write for the Beaverton

Leafs announce that making Matthews captain is the best way to distract fans from fact they haven't made any significant roster changes again

TORONTO - In a press conference scheduled for Wednesday, the Toronto Maple Leafs are expected to announce that, after much deliberation, they believe giving Auston Matthews the captaincy is the best way to get everyone to stop talking about how they're basically running back the same roster that...

www.thebeaverton.com

Other moves the franchise considered to distract fans included raising ticket prices to even more absurd amounts, giving Carlton razor sharp teeth like a real polar bear, taking down one of the retired jersey banners of a player from the thirties to see if anyone notices, and making the Bieber designed reverse jerseys the everyday sweater. But in the end they decided to go with Matthews.

And raising ticket prices.