OT: Bullshitting at the Barbershop part III

[Comeds]

Now that the writers and actors strikes are both over, I was up all night working on a script for a new series. Its about an athlete who commits a crime and has to spend some time in a halfway house with other recently released people from all walks of life. While there he (and we) learn valuable lessons about humanity through compassion, understanding, and humor. It's called "Alex".
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Alex walks into kitchen (studio audience applauds and cheers) wearing an old robe and boxers. He is unshaven. He goes to pour milk in his coffee but barely a drop comes out.
"God dammit, who put the cream back while its empty? When you finish it you replace it. I swear, one phone call to Moscow you are all dead. Every one of you ***********s are dead. You never grandma again, one phone call! Replace the creamer everyone! Oh, and TGIF and lets get ready for a great weekend!"
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close up of a bathroom door
"Who the fuck used the last of the toilet paper without changing it? I bet it was one of the **************s! I will call Moscow and have your parents killed. They will dig up your childhood dog, shoot it, then re-bury it. One phone call you ***************s. I can do it mother fuckers, you know I can. One phone call! We will then kill your childhood dog's puppies and their puppies, erasing Buddy's entire bloodline! Make fucking bolognese! Get Anna on the phone!"
Credits roll over rant

 

[dash]

 

[thedddd]

When I heard she won, I assumed it was for a new song. I was halfway through posting a "Fast Horse" joke when I saw it actually was for Fast Car, so I trashed it. It would have been tremendous.

Seriously I had no clue her song was redone as a country song until I saw this article.

 

[dare2be]

Seriously I had no clue her song was redone as a country song until I saw this article.

I guess a fast car falls into one of the categories of muh truck, muh girl, muh dog, muh gun.

 

[forty_three]

Seriously I had no clue her song was redone as a country song until I saw this article.

I was quite confused about it all myself. Like "oh they finally realize it's a great song 30 some years later?"

 

[dash]

I was quite confused about it all myself. Like "oh they finally realize it's a great song 30 some years later?"

Maybe I'm in the minority, but I much prefer this Tracy Chapman song to 'Fast Car'...

 

[Comeds]

I left early today and Jenkins changed my voicemail greeting to say I couldn't take calls because I was "on the toilet".
Normally I wouldn't care but Barbara our new benefits coordinator was trying to reach me, and shes pretty.

 

[puckhead]

pretty terrifying

 

[dare2be]

Maybe I'm in the minority, but I much prefer this Tracy Chapman song to 'Fast Car'...

You're in the minority of country fans... it's too cerebral.

 

[Comeds]

Hard to believe.....

Biohacker Bryan Johnson reveals he shocks his penis

Johnson has revealed his penis is 15 years younger thanks to his controversial de-aging methods - which include using electric shock therapy to 'rejuvenate' the penis.

www.dailymail.co.uk

 

[puckhead]

Not a bad strategy, to be honest

 

[thedddd]

Hard to believe.....

Biohacker Bryan Johnson reveals he shocks his penis

Johnson has revealed his penis is 15 years younger thanks to his controversial de-aging methods - which include using electric shock therapy to 'rejuvenate' the penis.

www.dailymail.co.uk

He is up against some stiff competition with younger bands.

 

[puckhead]

An oldie, but the commentary is terrific

 

[dash]

 

[forty_three]

Was out with the kid this evening and we stopped to eat. As we were waiting for our food someone approached the counter to ask if the tea the place served was vegan.

My kid scoffed and said, quite a bit too loud, "Like everyone else uses meat leaves".

 

[dash]

 

[forty_three]

 

[mattola]

 

[Bloody Brian Burke]

Feel like this guy knew what he was doing posting this one today with the 10 Freeway closed through DTLA due to a “pallet yard fire”.

 

[puckhead]

holy