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Coffee Talk: 7 Words You Can't Say to Jack Johnson

dash

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talkin-to-me-you-talkin-to-me.gif
 

Loco2

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MAGA Guy 1: "You're a softie!! You're a nobody!! Your movies suck! You're..."
MAGA Guy 2: "Woah, woah, woah... DeNiro's movies suck? I don't like his politics, but have you seen Meet the Parents? That shit is hilarious."
MAGA Guy 1: "Oh...noooooooo... THAT is the Little Fockers' guy? I didn't even know!! Holy shit... he was in Dirty Grandpa."
MAGA Guy 2: "Exactly, what one of the greatest comedic actors of our time!!!"
MAGA Guy 1: "True, my bad, I loved him in Taxi too."
MAGA Guy 2: "What? Taxi?!? Are you thinking of Danny Devito?"
MAGA Guy 1: "From Twins?!? No, I KNOW who fucking Danny Devito is... who am I thinking of?"
MAGA Guy 2: "..."
MAGA Guy 2: "...Judd Hirsch maybe?"
MAGA Guy 1: "That's it! Judd Fucking Hirsch"
MAGA Guy 2: "He was in Joker too, ya know."
MAGA Guy 1: "Wow, how did he lose all that weight for..."
MAGA Guy 2: "No, no... that's Joaquin Phoenix. DeNiro played the Johnny Carson guy in the show."
MAGA Guy 1: "Ohhhhh, okay got it. He was good. And that Phoenix guy was great in Shutter Islands!!"
MAGA Guy 2: "Yes he was!"
MAGA Guy 1: "..."
MAGA Guy 1: "...Anyways..."
MAGA Guy 1: "Fuck you, Jack Byrnes!! We know you are not a florist!!!"
 

forty_three

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Prosecution closing arguments about Cohen:

"We didn't choose him as a witness. They chose him. They hired him as a fixer. For all the same reasons they want you to discount his testimony now"
 

mattola

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Prosecution closing arguments about Cohen:

"We didn't choose him as a witness. They chose him. They hired him as a fixer. For all the same reasons they want you to discount his testimony now"
Defense Closing Arguments:

"He didn't do it, no take backs infinity +1"

<plugs ears>"NANANANANAAN CANT HEAR YOU </plugs ears>
 

dash

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mattola

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This just in .. Pope apologizes for getting caught and exposed


Fucking sham of a cult
 

dare2be

IST EIN PINGUINE
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I say put all religions in one big cage match and let them fight to the death. No weapons.

Is Greenland available? Maybe Antarctica.
 

Loco2

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Ken Burns commencement speech excerpt from Brandeis University:
"...I have had the privilege for nearly half a century of making films about the US, but I have also made films about us. That is to say the two letter, lowercase, plural pronoun. All of the intimacy of 'us' and also 'we' and 'our' and all of the majesty, complexity, contradiction, and even controversy of the US. And if I have learned anything over those years, it's that there's only us. There is no them. And whenever someone suggests to you, whomever it may be in your life that there's a them, run away. Othering is the simplistic binary way to make and identify enemies, but it is also the surest way to your own self imprisonment."
 

KennyBanyeah

Buckle up!!
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This just in .. Pope apologizes for getting caught and exposed


Fucking sham of a cult

The pope is really just fulfilling a mandate. I mean if they let gay people in to their MLM there won't be room for their regular quota of pedos. It's just math. Math and absolutely disgusting people.
 

dash

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As Jim Jefferies said one night on stage, put all the scientists, engineers, and technical experts in the front car of the societal train (you know, where the engine is) and put all the religious zealots in the second car. Then get one of the engineers to pull the pin leaving the zealots behind to feast on one another.
 
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