OT: Bullshitting at the Barbershop

[Comeds]

Anyone remember the nice Tim Horton's ad where a young man is holding his food looking for a seat but the place is full and a nice family lets him sit with them? The same thing kind of happened to me today at Boston Market. I was standing with my tray hoping someone would leave so I could sit when a nice older couple told me to sit with them. They were a bit older - probably late 70s, smokier, and I'll be honest a little creepier than the TV commercial people but who am I to judge? I probably dont match up well to the commercial boy.

Anyway I sit down and we small talk about the weather. Henry had one of those voice box machines, I didnt ask if he had cancer. I just assumed. Helen was nice and kept smiling. Maybe they were not so creepy after all. Just as I took my first bite Henry leaned over and in barely a machine generated whisper said "if you let her blow you and let me watch - we'll pay for your sandwich". I was really shocked and a bit dissapointed....

Wait, Im doing it again. My wife always tells me that I tell my stories in the wrong order, that I 'bury the lead'. Let me start over.

Hey guys, I got a free sandwich today!

 

[dash]

You are one wacky guy comeds (but funny).

 

[blindbaby]

Anyone remember the nice Tim Horton's ad where a young man is holding his food looking for a seat but the place is full and a nice family lets him sit with them? The same thing kind of happened to me today at Boston Market. I was standing with my tray hoping someone would leave so I could sit when a nice older couple told me to sit with them. They were a bit older - probably late 70s, smokier, and I'll be honest a little creepier than the TV commercial people but who am I to judge? I probably dont match up well to the commercial boy.

Anyway I sit down and we small talk about the weather. Henry had one of those voice box machines, I didnt ask if he had cancer. I just assumed. Helen was nice and kept smiling. Maybe they were not so creepy after all. Just as I took my first bite Henry leaned over and in barely a machine generated whisper said "if you let her blow you and let me watch - we'll pay for your sandwich". I was really shocked and a bit dissapointed....

Wait, Im doing it again. My wife always tells me that I tell my stories in the wrong order, that I 'bury the lead'. Let me start over.

Hey guys, I got a free sandwich today!

That will probably be my favourite read of the day.

 

[jstewismybastardson]

would have thought for sure comeds would hold out for a free Tim Hortons lasagna

 

[dash]

Gas, milk, and now automobiles?

Canadian car buyers blocked from cheaper U.S. prices - Yahoo Finance Canada

 

[IPostedWhat]

Gas, milk, and now automobiles?

Canadian car buyers blocked from cheaper U.S. prices - Yahoo Finance Canada

Why do Canadians want to buy cars from America anyways?

Are you guys running out of horses and dog sleds?

 

[dash]

Why do Canadians want to buy cars from America anyways?

Are you guys running out of horses and dog sleds?

I want something that gets more than 40 rods to the hogshead.

 

[IPostedWhat]

I want something that gets more than 40 rods to the hogshead.

Are we talking Moose now or something? Google translate just sits there looking at me saying "sorry".

 

[jstewismybastardson]

@vicpdcanada: If you're missing a replica handgun that you left behind during a B&E in the 500 Block of Bay st, give us a call.

 

[jstewismybastardson]

thats no good (although it would be cool if it actually happened in Philly )

[ame="[MEDIA=twitter]405717772866297856[/MEDIA]"][/ame]

 

[mooger_35]

@vicpdcanada: If you're missing a replica handgun that you left behind during a B&E in the 500 Block of Bay st, give us a call.

I have to give credit to the Vic PD for having a pretty funny twitter account. They definitely have some fun with it.

 

[jstewismybastardson]

bastards!

Does a Viral Picture Show a Giant Snake That Swallowed a Woman in South Africa?

 

[dash]

bastards!

Does a Viral Picture Show a Giant Snake That Swallowed a Woman in South Africa?

That's like going into a dealership and buying Voight's LeBaron only to discover the warranty card in the glove compartment and see that he spelt his first name J-o-h-n.

 

[mattola]

That's like going into a dealership and buying Voight's LeBaron only to discover the warranty card in the glove compartment and see that he spelt his fist name J-o-h-n.

Its Seinfeld Day today

check that..

Its Costanza DAy

 

[jstewismybastardson]

Its Seinfeld Day today

on that note:

Is That a Nipple on the Front Page of the New York Times? Yes, That Is a Nipple on the Front Page of the New York Times.

Nipple on the front page of the New York Times: Now what?s that about the breast cancer gene in Israel?

 

[Darkstone42]

Norfolk police warn of alarming clown epidemic | UK news | theguardian.com

 

[puckhead]

shit.

 

[Winged_Wheel88]

^^ Damn cops. First it was this:

 

[puckhead]

so, some moron stole the Victoria Clipper (a commuter ferry) out of the Seattle Harbor
this was his escape route.

 

[puckhead]

what a jughead

Archie Comics CEO sued for allegedly calling men 'penis'