A sweaty & coked up Dexter Manley says Tom Brady sucks! I should buy us boat! I miss my mom.

[rmilia1]

How NOT To Troll Patriots Nation: Dexter Manley Says Tom Brady Is 'Garbage', 'Can't Pick Up A First Down'

How NOT To Troll Patriots Nation: Dexter Manley Says Tom Brady Is ‘Garbage’, ‘Can’t Pick Up A First Down’
By Matt Dolloff, CBS BostonSeptember 24, 2015 11:43 AM
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Tom Brady (Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images)



Trolls have invaded sports media since Tom Brady and the Patriots won the Super Bowl and dragged the world through DeflateGate. Some have legitimate gripes with the way the admittedly great Patriots push the boundaries of the rules; others go to dizzyingly outrageous lengths to dismiss or diminish Brady’s talents and accomplishments. That’s when trolling is elevated to performanceView attachment 33025 art.

Chris Simms, for instance, is among the elite in Brady trolling. His asinine take that Jim McNally and John Jastremski’s reinstatement makes Tom Brady guilty is so absurd it almost sounds plausible, and you have to respect his commitment to keeping Brady out of histop 5 quarterbacks – even now. San Francisco news radio host Chip Franklin took trolling to another level in saying he would take Tim Tebow over Brady, which goaded Tom Brady Sr. to call in and yell at him. These takes are foolish, but they are at least compelling enough to arouse anger.

Which brings us to former NFL defensive end Dexter Manley. The same Manley who infamously lost his jobafter calling Troy Aikman a homophobic slur. He aimed to take the trolling crown with his Brady take that he delivered on Washington D.C.’s 106.7 The FanThursday morning, and unfortunately for him he tries way too hard to be that guy.

“First of all let me tell you something, let me ask you guys a question: who would you take, Joe Theismann or Tom Brady?” said Manley, according to the Washington Post. “I’m taking Joe T…Tom Brady can’t even pack Joe Theismann’s jock…I think Tom Brady can’t pick up a first down. He has no athletic skillsView attachment 33026, he’s surrounded by good people, but the guy is in the toilet, in my opinion. In my opinion he’s in the toilet.”

Manley wasn’t done there. He continued: “I’ll take Joe Theismann, I’ll take [Matt Ryan], anything over Tom Brady…I’ll take Joe Theismann first, I’ll take Matty Ice second, and I might take Doug Williams third, but I’m not gonna take Tom Brady to lead my team nowhere…Tom Brady is garbage. He can’t pick up a first down. He has no athletic skill. He’s surrounded by people, but Tom Brady is garbage. Garbage!”

Yawn.

By making such stunningly obtuse remarks, Manley’s take is too daft to be a convincing troll-job. Saying Brady is “garbage” and “can’t pick up a first down” is the lowest of low-hanging fruit, but his obvious dedication to trolling is too much for the comments to matter. There’s no substance to it and certainly no arguments to back it up. It ceases to be controversial and becomes pitifully cringe-worthy.

I’ll admit two things: 1. I haven’t heard the audio of the interview, so it’s unclear if Manley commented in jest; and 2. By writing 700 words about this I am feeding the troll. Manley has an NFL Network special on his life coming out soon, so he’s trying to get his name out there. And as the Washington Post points out, Manley has been making outrageous statementsView attachment 33027 to grab headlines for years. There’s no way he believes what he’s saying here. But admittedly, I’m playing right into his hands.

But I just had to point this out as an example of how not to troll New England about Tom Brady. If you want to tear Brady down, or just knock him down a few pegs, at least bring something that sounds like it came from planet Earth. Chris Simms makes me seethe when I hear him. His conviction makes me queasy. His BS is so nauseating that he practically rubs your nose in it. Manley’s take is as boringly inane as it gets.

Manley obviously wanted to grab headlines today, and he will succeedView attachment 33028 tremendously. But when it comes to trolling Patriots nation, the region will emerge from this ice-cold take unfazed. If Simms is still king of the Brady trolls, Manley is nothing more than a peasant.

God I bet Matt Ryan is all like" why the fuck are you bringing my name into this dumb shit!!"... Theismann and Williams probably love it though LOL

 

[sonnyblack65]

I don't care if his dad is the POTUS, he's crying like Brady is being bullied in kindergarten. He needs to STFU.

I dont care how old my son is, if some motherfucker is bashing and badmouthing him, he is lucky if I am only verbal

 

[Rock Strongo]

I dont care how old my son is, if some motherfucker is bashing and badmouthing him, he is lucky if I am only verbal

i was 35, and my old man came to my divorce proceeding to be sure she wasnt trying to be sneaky.

a parents job is never done.

 

[NWPATSFAN]

It's subjective of course, but he is certainly in EVERYONE'S top 50 QB list. That's a no brainer...

I can name one person who doesn't agree with you

 

[Cyder]

his dads a very respected lawyer.

his son just helped gang r*pe goodell in court.

speaking of goodell...has anyone heard from or seen him since opening night?

this isnt a good look for him.

I disagree, never seeing Goodell anywhere is a great look for him

 

[sonnyblack65]

i was 35, and my old man came to my divorce proceeding to be sure she wasnt trying to be sneaky.

a parents job is never done.

Absolutely my son is 18, as you know is at Assumption College 6 3 played football and Rugby Div 1, anybody bothers him, has to deal with me. Now if it's a college kid, I wont interfere

 

[Cyder]

i was 35, and my old man came to my divorce proceeding to be sure she wasnt trying to be sneaky.

a parents job is never done.

Unless of course we're talking about my mother.

 

[NWPATSFAN]

I stopped reading when I saw that Brady's daddy called a radio station to defend his baby.
I know if I was in Brady's shoes I'd tell daddy to shut his fucking mouth. I can't see how his daddy is helping him, it's embarrassing for a grown man to be defended by daddy.

Said Marshawn Lynch

 

[geezer]

I would put Brady* in the top 50, current, maybe. But all time? No.

 

[NWPATSFAN]

I would put Brady* in the top 50, current, maybe. But all time? No.

 

[sonnyblack65]

I would put Brady* in the top 50, current, maybe. But all time? No.

You really think there are QB's worse than him? Maybe he cracks top 95

 

[HammerDown]

"Sweaty and coked up"

LOL

 

[clemtheslowson]

I would put Brady* in the top 50, current, maybe. But all time? No.

Then you'd be a fucking moron.

 

[Caliskinsfan]

Dexter being Dexter, lmfao

 

[Rex Racer]

I'm too busy laughing at the thought of watching Dexter attempting to write his own name to care what he says.

And Tom Brady is definitely a top 50 all time QB.

 

[geezer]

Then you'd be a fucking moron.

Thank you, nicest thing I have been called this week! What is the limit on potty mouth bass?

 

[Dude]

He does suck. He sucks the lifeblood out of opposing warriors and leaves them fluttering in the wind like paper dolls and makes them wonder ... how the F did he complete another two-yard dink??

 

[GNG]

I stopped reading when I saw that Brady's daddy called a radio station to defend his baby.
I know if I was in Brady's shoes I'd tell daddy to shut his fucking mouth. I can't see how his daddy is helping him, it's embarrassing for a grown man to be defended by daddy.

Ms. Brady is still a little kid at heart.

 

[GNG]

I'm too busy laughing at the thought of watching Dexter attempting to write his own name to care what he says.

And Tom Brady is definitely a top 50 all time QB.

I've listed him at #25.

 

[NWPATSFAN]

I've listed him at #25.

Well that's good. Now we can all sleep better.