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Automattic
I'm baaaaaaack....
Page 1 (The cover for some reason?!) - Kinda bland. Black/gray(grey? Whatev...) features 4 of the regular superstars shoved down our throat. (sorry, no Max Talbot)
Page 2 - Ovi/Crosby...
...Hey look! We're on page 3 already! (I accidently spilled vomit on page 2) - Collectibles from some big outdoor hockey game. (Don't see any MSU or MU gear though...
)
Page 4 - Zach Parise in street clothes. Move along people, nothing new to see here...
Pages 6/7 - Hats. A lot are too gangbangerish for my liking. I guess Ray Emery needs a hat too....and don't try to touch it, Muthafucka!
Page 8 - A "Just For Men" model wearing a Flyers hoodie. I guess Leino was unavailable for the "Rogaine" photoshoot...
Page 9 - Two watches set to the incorrect time. The Sharks and the Islanders. Ironically, one is off by 3 months and the other is off by 3 decades...
Page 10 - The "Just For Men" guy is now wearing a Habs hoodie. So that's what "ole" means...
Page 12 - Eric Staal is trying to look like the buffest of all the Staals. Stamkos is posing with the stick he is scoring with while wearing a pink tie and a fauxhawk. One out of three ain't bad...
(sorry, i fell asleep)
Page 13 - Girly crap.
Page 14 - A picture of a Ranger fan high fiving a Red Wing fan, A Bruin fan with his arm around a Canuck, and a Shark fan pumping his fist. Where are these bleachers located and WTF are they watching!?!
Page 15 - Overpriced T-shirts
Pages 16/17 - Practice Jerseys. Just in case your wallet needs "warmed up" before going broke on a real jersey...(The Wings have the best anyway)
Pages 18-21 - Those jerseys I was talking about that you can't afford now because I talked you into buying two Detroit practice jerseys.
Page 22 - A mom with what is presumed to be her 4 kids. It looks like the work of 3 different dads. I'm pretty sure 2 of them are Sean Avery's...
Page 24 - A knocked up chick wearing a Capitals maternity shirt that says "Rookie". She is looking down and not smiling....Oh, I see what she is looking at. Alyssa Milano is underneath her. (You're looking for a copy now, aren't you?)
Page 25 - A Ducks purse. No word yet if it's the one Perry swung at Pavel...
Page 27 - Some Bruins baby booties. Don't worry Jeff, I'm sure they have your size.
There's also a Coyote baby bib. Gary is trying to find one big enough to wrap around the entire franchise as you read this...
Page 29 - A picture of a Sedin. Which one? Hell, I don't know. The one with trophies? The goofy looking one?
Page 30 - FUCK DALLAS![/SIZE]
Page 31 - Rangers and Habs replica Stanley Cups. They are backordered. And dusty...
Page 32 - A Flames wastebasket. Anything you want to throw in it, Dash?
Also a Rangers rocking chair. (insert your own joke here. I'm tired of carrying you people this whole post)
Page 33 - A father and son hanging out in a room decked out Maple Leaf style. They are both crying on the inside...
Page 35 - A Chicago fan wearing a shirt that says "HAWKS FAN" on the back. I wonder what his mom wrote on the tag inside?
And finally the back cover - Brand new Digital Camo gear!!! I guess somebody along the line failed to realize that effective hockey camo should probably be....I don't know...maybe....WHITE!?
I hope you enjoyed my analysis. Can I borrow 200 dollars?

Page 2 - Ovi/Crosby...
...Hey look! We're on page 3 already! (I accidently spilled vomit on page 2) - Collectibles from some big outdoor hockey game. (Don't see any MSU or MU gear though...

Page 4 - Zach Parise in street clothes. Move along people, nothing new to see here...
Pages 6/7 - Hats. A lot are too gangbangerish for my liking. I guess Ray Emery needs a hat too....and don't try to touch it, Muthafucka!
Page 8 - A "Just For Men" model wearing a Flyers hoodie. I guess Leino was unavailable for the "Rogaine" photoshoot...
Page 9 - Two watches set to the incorrect time. The Sharks and the Islanders. Ironically, one is off by 3 months and the other is off by 3 decades...
Page 10 - The "Just For Men" guy is now wearing a Habs hoodie. So that's what "ole" means...
Page 12 - Eric Staal is trying to look like the buffest of all the Staals. Stamkos is posing with the stick he is scoring with while wearing a pink tie and a fauxhawk. One out of three ain't bad...
(sorry, i fell asleep)
Page 13 - Girly crap.
Page 14 - A picture of a Ranger fan high fiving a Red Wing fan, A Bruin fan with his arm around a Canuck, and a Shark fan pumping his fist. Where are these bleachers located and WTF are they watching!?!
Page 15 - Overpriced T-shirts
Pages 16/17 - Practice Jerseys. Just in case your wallet needs "warmed up" before going broke on a real jersey...(The Wings have the best anyway)
Pages 18-21 - Those jerseys I was talking about that you can't afford now because I talked you into buying two Detroit practice jerseys.
Page 22 - A mom with what is presumed to be her 4 kids. It looks like the work of 3 different dads. I'm pretty sure 2 of them are Sean Avery's...
Page 24 - A knocked up chick wearing a Capitals maternity shirt that says "Rookie". She is looking down and not smiling....Oh, I see what she is looking at. Alyssa Milano is underneath her. (You're looking for a copy now, aren't you?)
Page 25 - A Ducks purse. No word yet if it's the one Perry swung at Pavel...
Page 27 - Some Bruins baby booties. Don't worry Jeff, I'm sure they have your size.

There's also a Coyote baby bib. Gary is trying to find one big enough to wrap around the entire franchise as you read this...
Page 29 - A picture of a Sedin. Which one? Hell, I don't know. The one with trophies? The goofy looking one?
Page 30 - FUCK DALLAS![/SIZE]
Page 31 - Rangers and Habs replica Stanley Cups. They are backordered. And dusty...
Page 32 - A Flames wastebasket. Anything you want to throw in it, Dash?

Also a Rangers rocking chair. (insert your own joke here. I'm tired of carrying you people this whole post)
Page 33 - A father and son hanging out in a room decked out Maple Leaf style. They are both crying on the inside...
Page 35 - A Chicago fan wearing a shirt that says "HAWKS FAN" on the back. I wonder what his mom wrote on the tag inside?
And finally the back cover - Brand new Digital Camo gear!!! I guess somebody along the line failed to realize that effective hockey camo should probably be....I don't know...maybe....WHITE!?
I hope you enjoyed my analysis. Can I borrow 200 dollars?
