Kiffin suing Alabama?

[Mike30142]

TUSCALOOSA, AL — Lane Kiffin has been relieved of his duties as Alabama’s offensive coordinator before next week’s national championship game, but Kiffin reportedly won’t go without out a fight. According to several sources, Kiffin plans to sue Alabama and head coach Nick Saban to prevent them from using “all of my good plays.”

“I’ve got a lot of good plays and I put them in the playbook,” Kiffin wrote in an e-mail to Saban, Alabama athletics director Bill Battle and other staffers. “You can’t use them without me or that’s intellectual property theft. My wife’s cousin is a lawyer and I’m going to SUE YOUR ASSES.”

“I made up a lot of good plays, both runs and passes and a lot of them go for a whole bunch of yards if you do them right,” the e-mail continued. “I was going to use them at my new job at Atlantic Florida or whatever and blow everyone away and then takeover the Patriots when Belichick retires. If you use my plays it is STEALING which is a FELONY CRIME. You have been warned!”

Sources say Saban immediately crumpled up a copy of the e-mail that was printed for him by his secretary, saying: “Stupid dipshit. Playbooks are team property. We’ll crush him.”

Nearby, Kiffin was banging on the front door of the football facility and yelling: “Let me in! You’ve got my playbook! Thieves!” But no one let him into the building and he could not gain access himself because his swipe card was taken upon his dismissal. “I should have made a copy of those plays,” Kiffin was heard mumbling to himself after he gave up banging on the glass and walked back to his idling Camaro.

Later, back at his home, Kiffin received a delivery at his front door of an envelope labeled YOUR PLAYS. Inside he found a piece of paper with a poop emoji printed on it.

 

[RobBase]

 

[TheRobotDevil]

TUSCALOOSA, AL — Lane Kiffin has been relieved of his duties as Alabama’s offensive coordinator before next week’s national championship game, but Kiffin reportedly won’t go without out a fight. According to several sources, Kiffin plans to sue Alabama and head coach Nick Saban to prevent them from using “all of my good plays.”

“I’ve got a lot of good plays and I put them in the playbook,” Kiffin wrote in an e-mail to Saban, Alabama athletics director Bill Battle and other staffers. “You can’t use them without me or that’s intellectual property theft. My wife’s cousin is a lawyer and I’m going to SUE YOUR ASSES.”

“I made up a lot of good plays, both runs and passes and a lot of them go for a whole bunch of yards if you do them right,” the e-mail continued. “I was going to use them at my new job at Atlantic Florida or whatever and blow everyone away and then takeover the Patriots when Belichick retires. If you use my plays it is STEALING which is a FELONY CRIME. You have been warned!”

Sources say Saban immediately crumpled up a copy of the e-mail that was printed for him by his secretary, saying: “Stupid dipshit. Playbooks are team property. We’ll crush him.”

Nearby, Kiffin was banging on the front door of the football facility and yelling: “Let me in! You’ve got my playbook! Thieves!” But no one let him into the building and he could not gain access himself because his swipe card was taken upon his dismissal. “I should have made a copy of those plays,” Kiffin was heard mumbling to himself after he gave up banging on the glass and walked back to his idling Camaro.

Later, back at his home, Kiffin received a delivery at his front door of an envelope labeled YOUR PLAYS. Inside he found a piece of paper with a poop emoji printed on it.

Kiffin's playbook has more than just bubble screens?

 

[bamabear82]

Kiffin's playbook has more than just bubble screens?

Now you're gonna get sued for telling everyone his plays. Way to go.

 

[fishinabarrel]

 

[963BUSC]

Alabama's offense is so good a drunk could run it

 

[RobToxin]

TUSCALOOSA, AL — Lane Kiffin has been relieved of his duties as Alabama’s offensive coordinator before next week’s national championship game, but Kiffin reportedly won’t go without out a fight. According to several sources, Kiffin plans to sue Alabama and head coach Nick Saban to prevent them from using “all of my good plays.”

“I’ve got a lot of good plays and I put them in the playbook,” Kiffin wrote in an e-mail to Saban, Alabama athletics director Bill Battle and other staffers. “You can’t use them without me or that’s intellectual property theft. My wife’s cousin is a lawyer and I’m going to SUE YOUR ASSES.”

“I made up a lot of good plays, both runs and passes and a lot of them go for a whole bunch of yards if you do them right,” the e-mail continued. “I was going to use them at my new job at Atlantic Florida or whatever and blow everyone away and then takeover the Patriots when Belichick retires. If you use my plays it is STEALING which is a FELONY CRIME. You have been warned!”

Sources say Saban immediately crumpled up a copy of the e-mail that was printed for him by his secretary, saying: “Stupid dipshit. Playbooks are team property. We’ll crush him.”

Nearby, Kiffin was banging on the front door of the football facility and yelling: “Let me in! You’ve got my playbook! Thieves!” But no one let him into the building and he could not gain access himself because his swipe card was taken upon his dismissal. “I should have made a copy of those plays,” Kiffin was heard mumbling to himself after he gave up banging on the glass and walked back to his idling Camaro.

Later, back at his home, Kiffin received a delivery at his front door of an envelope labeled YOUR PLAYS. Inside he found a piece of paper with a poop emoji printed on it.

I am shocked no one has posted this yet!

You fuckers need to step your game up!

 

[B_dub]

Kiffin's playbook has more than just bubble screens?

Yeah. But he's got all kinds of bubble screens. Bubbles screens to the left, bubble screens to the right, called bubble screens where Saban gives you the "death stare" and you know you better hand the football off to one of your beasts at running back. Heck theres even bubble screens you call when they run a HB counter and you get left at the stadium waiting on for a bus.

 

[TheReal_NU]

I am shocked no one has posted this yet!

You fuckers need to step your game up!

That is a lucid, intelligent, well thought-out objection.
















Overruled.

 

[TheReal_NU]

And along the My Cousin Vinny line, comes Saban's response.

Hey, Lane, you're in Ala-fuckin'-bama. You come from California. You killed a good ol' offense. There is no way this is not going to trial!

 

[Bayou Tiger]

This is exactly what was in my mind while reading that !

 

[outofyourmind]

When he runs "his plays" at Florida Atlantic and they don't do shit, the judge will throw out the case.

 

[outofyourmind]

"ITS NOT THE ALIGNMENT, IT'S THE ALIGNEE'S"

Signed,
Barry Switzer

 

[Maize N Blue]

I hate Nick Saban with a passion! I hope this move comes back to bite him, his coaches, and all the redneck Alabama fans in the ass!

 

[TheReal_NU]

I hate Nick Saban with a passion! I hope this move comes back to bite him, his coaches, and all the redneck Alabama fans in the ass!

ooh you are a smooth talker. You are... you are!

 

[TheReal_NU]

Sweet.

@Maize N Blue

My very first bullshit rating.

For a My Cousin Vinny quote.

 

[Mike30142]

I hate Nick Saban with a passion! I hope this move comes back to bite him, his coaches, and all the redneck Alabama fans in the ass!

 

[TJL]

Lol @ the ppl getting rustled by an Adam Sandler flick

 

[TheReal_NU]

Lol @ the ppl getting rustled by an Adam Sandler flick

Honestly, I figured maize was going along with the joke.

Now I think he actually believed the whole story.



Or, he hates the movie???

 

[4down20]

Honestly, I figured maize was going along with the joke.

Now I think he actually believed the whole story.



Or, he hates the movie???

He's a Michigan and Auburn fan and you think he understood things?

You high or something?