tOfficial Night Shift Thread

[Rusty Kuntz]

Prankster eh? Would you try the whole "this is the water company, we need you to flush your toilette," gag?

I'd be like "I heard that your refrigerator was running... You better go catch it."

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

Hello night shift

Hola!

 

[ForkEmBucky]

I'd be like "I heard that your refrigerator was running... You better go catch it."

Hah! Won't work. I bolted my fridge to the wall after somebody called me the last time about this...

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

Hah! Won't work. I bolted my fridge to the wall after somebody called me the last time about this...

Weirdo...

 

[ForkEmBucky]

Weirdo...

At least I'm not marrying Ronald McDonald!

 

[ladyrockess]

Hey rockess I have a friend who plans on going to cape town next year .was wondering if you could tell me how nice it is and anything they might want to see and places to eat and stay and whatnot

Cape Town is gorgeous!

There are some rules you absolutely have to follow in South Africa though:
1) Never go anywhere alone, especially if you are really young, really old, or vulnerable (aka not a Ultimate Fighting Champion).
2) When you're driving in a car, all doors must be locked at all times.
3) Never leave shopping or any sort of bag or jacket inside a car - keep them in the trunk.
4) For the love of all that's good and holy, be careful when you go out late at night - it's the most profitable time for muggers because you have cash on you for restaurants and the like.
5) Don't wave around wads of cash; avoid wearing too much jewelry. This past summer was the first time in 18 years my mother has worn her engagement ring in South Africa (we were back on vacation), and she was still as nervous as a cat about it the whole time.
6) Park under bright lights if you can, and near security cameras. One night this vacation my mother's old coworker and my cousin's wife had a lovely conversation about how their windshields shattered when they were attacked in their cars in parking garages.
7) If you have a wallet, keep it in your front pocket and keep your hand on it while you're out...it's really easy for a pickpocket to nab those, same as cellphones and things.


Now, stuff to do:

1) Go up Table Mountain. It's SO lovely! If your friends are athletic you can bike or hike up or down; if not there's a ride up and down the mountain and you can just walk around the top. It's gorgeous, the views are awe-inspiring, and there's a lot of cool wildlife, including dassies, which are some of my favorite animals ever.
1a) Cape Point - Flying Dutchman Funicular - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I haven't actually done this, but it's not for want of whining about it.
Welcome to Cape Town & the Western Cape - Cape Point Tourism - Full article

2) Kirstenbosch - it's a big natural park/garden, so if your friends like outdoors, walking, photography, and nature, they'll find a lot to do there. Plus it has some great restaurants.

3) Boulders Beach - aka Boulders Bay, near Simon's Town, it's home to a great penguin colony. There are lots of paths and walkways and you can get right up next to the penguins and it's really a great stop. I've been three times.

4) Simon's Town - small, beachy town right off Cape Town, very cute with lots of boutiques, antique stores, great little restaurants, boardwalks, etc.

5) The Waterfront - it's a huge complex of hotels, restaurants, shops, all sorts of things - I think you can even meet cruises on it. There's a Paulaner brewery there, that's also a restaurant. Food is FANTASTIC, as is the beer.
Welcome to Cape Town & the Western Cape - The V&A Waterfront - Full article

Paulaner Brewery - Paulaner Bruhaus & Restaurant, Victoria & Alfred Waterfront restaurant Western Cape | Cape Town restaurant Victoria & Alfred Waterfront South Africa

6) The Wine Route - if your friends are into wine at all. Cape Point Wine Route, Cape Town

7) The Ostrich Farm - Cape Point Ostrich Farm in Cape Point, Western Cape

8) The Market - for shopping, any African style doohickeys tourists might like...I haven't been to this one, but I have been to the one in Durban and that one is fun.
The Pan African Market in Cape Town Central, Western Cape

9) Robben Island - I've never been, nor wanted to, but some people like the history around it.
Robben Island, Cape Town

10) Helicopter Tour - I've always wanted to do this, but it's expensive...
Helicopter Flip over Cape Town in V&A Waterfront, Western Cape


If your friends don't mind driving a lot, I totally 100% recommend they drive up to Knysna - one of the most beautiful places in the entire world, with so much to do, hiking, boating, shopping, dining...wonderful place. It is 6-7 hours drive from Cape Town though, so they need to have some time to spare, and you really must spend at least three or four days there.

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

At least I'm not marrying Ronald McDonald!

I'm not marrying Ronnie Mac, dork... Gingers aren't my thing.

 

[ForkEmBucky]

I'm not marrying Ronnie Mac, dork... Gingers aren't my thing.

Oh that's right, you're marrying a Goofer.

 

[ForkEmBucky]

Okay. Lady. I am never going to South Africa. I can just drive to Milwaukee or Chicago if I want to get mugged. 4 hours round trip, if I don't include the hospital stay and the police reports. Assuming I'm going back...

 

[ChiefWhiteHorse]

Why would someone voluntarily go back to cape town if they were attacked there?

 

[ForkEmBucky]

Why would someone voluntarily go back to cape town if they were attacked there?

Well, when it's home I can understand. I want to see South Africa, but apparently I'm not going until I can afford a brigade strength security force.

 

[TheRobotDevil]

I'd be like "I heard that your refrigerator was running... You better go catch it."

Try calling lowest or home depot at 6am ask to speak to the lumber department and when they pick up ask if they have morning wood

 

[ladyrockess]

Why would someone voluntarily go back to cape town if they were attacked there?

My mother's old coworker and my cousin live in Johannesburg.

And South Africa is much safer than it was 18 or even 5 years ago - they really cleaned it up for the World Cup. But it certainly behooves you to watch your back. I would never go anywhere alone in South Africa, and I was born there. My family and friends who still live there do go about alone, but then, they're more used to it.

 

[Disney Plorster]

Why would someone voluntarily go back to cape town if they were attacked there?

Why do Somalians pirates in little fish boats attack Saudi oil tankers? Sometimes things just don't make sense.

 

[Disney Plorster]

My mother's old coworker and my cousin live in Johannesburg.

And South Africa is much safer than it was 18 or even 5 years ago - they really cleaned it up for the World Cup. But it certainly behooves you to watch your back. I would never go anywhere alone in South Africa, and I was born there. My family and friends who still live there do go about alone, but then, they're more used to it.

Jacob Zuma always talked about how great it is there though. At least he took a shower.

 

[ForkEmBucky]

Even the major tourist areas aren't well patrolled and locked down? I'm kind of surprised, to be honest. In most countries there are areas where the government has put a lot of effort into making things relaxed and safe for tourism.

Then again you can get your ass kidnapped in Cancun so...

 

[ladyrockess]

Even the major tourist areas aren't well patrolled and locked down? I'm kind of surprised, to be honest. In most countries there are areas where the government has put a lot of effort into making things relaxed and safe for tourism.

Then again you can get your ass kidnapped in Cancun so...

A lot of tourist places are crawling with cops, and they're really not too bad, but when even locals get hit - and they do - I definitely need to warn any tourist going their to watch their ass.

 

[Rusty Kuntz]

Oh that's right, you're marrying a Goofer.

He's not much of a Gophers fan.

 

[TheRobotDevil]

thanks rockess the guy who is going isnt a ufc champion but he was an army ranger

 

[ladyrockess]

Oh and Jacob Zuma is stupider and a less productive member of society than the shit stains that cling to Britney Spears' toilet bowl.