returnofjakedog
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A run of questionable oldies:
The Ghoul (1975)-
Some 1920-30s era Gatsby wannabe rich kids decide to race a couple hundred miles to the coast at night. However they get stuck in heavy fog along the back roads and stumble into an isolated mansion where the creepy servant (John Hurt) tries to r*pe all the ladies, and something or someone is getting very stabby. Peter Cushing plays the "lord of the manor" and we see evidence of satanic rituals and cannibalism blended in for good measure.
A kinda disjointed flick that doesn't flow well. The protagonists are barely characters, and it feels like a late '50s-early 60s instead of '75. The story is good but mediocre execution hurts it.
5.5 outta 10 from me.
Island of Terror (1966)-
Another Peter Cushing flick but from 9 years previous to The Ghoul.
On a remote UK island people start disappearing. Local investigation finds boneless bodies (essentially piles of skin and flesh) that they can't explain so a couple of experts are brought in. Eventually they find out that a cancer research team has inadvertently created a silicon based life form that feeds on calcium and other minerals.
When I saw it I thought: "Wait a second. This plot is from an episode of the original Star Trek series! Even the creatures look the same." So I looked it up and it was from an episode called The Devil in the Dark, which is listed as one of the top episodes in most ST evaluations. However this episode was from 1967, so Star Trek was ripping off Island of Terror!
Everything here is done ok considering era and budget but it moves quite slow and focuses more on the mystery and events leading up to actually confronting the threat.
Early on the main actress comes off as strong willed, insisting she be involved in every step, only to revert to frightened femme who begs for protection when shit starts going down, which is kinda annoying. Cushing plays it all very straight forward, which is fine but rather non-distinct.
A 5 outta 10 from me. Needed an infusion of excitement as the creatures, while on one hand being a major threat, are very slow. The heros stand in place, shoot the creatures, then lob dynamite at them, and then go "Well that didn't work" and retreat a bit as the creatures inch their way forward. Not very suspenseful.
Curse 2: The Bite (1989)-
So I remember The Curse which is yet another adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft's The Colour Out of Space starring a young Wil Wheaton. It was a decent but flawed flick with a good story (but I haven't seen it in 30 years so my memory on it is a bit spotty).
Curse 2: The Bite is something else entirely.
A young couple is traveling west through desert scrub country and they encounter rattlesnakes at seemingly every turn. Eventually the boyfriend gets bitten so, for some reason, Jamie Farr (Klinger from MASH) gives him an antidote. The kids head on their way only for the bf's personality to start changing. An asshole local sheriff (played by the "always-good-as-an-asshole" Bo Svenson) harasses the couple. In the meantime Klinger realizes he gave the bf the wrong antidote and starts chasing them cross country. The bf goes full snake monster (mostly via his mutated snake arm!) and things come to a head as they try to kill the beast.
This one makes zero sense and is seemingly a precursor to ridiculous, intentionally bad SyFy flicks that came later. Klinger is ridiculous as the comic relief salesman who works with a bunch of psychotic truckers via cb radio to try to find the young couple.
But Screaming Mad George did the fxs, so they are a lot of fun!
3 outta 10 from me, but probably about a 6 outta 10 if viewed as a "so bad, it's good" flick. Some ridiculous fun hidden in the bizarre stupidity.
House of the Dead (aka Alien Zone) (1978)-
(No trailer, but here is a clip)
No, not the Uwe Boll much maligned video game movie but instead an obscure low budget 70's anthology film.
A business man leaves his lover's house and is mistakenly(?) dropped off in an isolated area during a big rain storm. He seeks shelter in an mortuary where the undertaker shows him dead bodies and tells them the tales surrounding their demises.
First a grumpy teacher who hates kids is scared in her house, and eventually attacked by zombie kids (?) (their only defining feature is huge teeth?).
The second corpse/tale involves a guy who invites women back to his place and then films hinself killing them.
The third story is about 2 world famous detectives who are trying to kill each other for some reason (pride I guess?). At least it actually has at least one decent actor in it.
The forth story is about an unempathic businessman who gets tortured and reduced to the homeless people he abused previously.
The framing story with the businessman and the mortician is probably the best of the lot but it's conclusion is as obvious as it is inevitable.
Not horrible considering the budget and era but a clunky, and dark (in appearance) film with poor acting and minimal fxs. I only continued watching it because I love anthology horror films but this one isn't very good by any stretch.
4 outta 10 from me. I appreciate the effort but the execution mostly fails.
The Ghoul (1975)-
Some 1920-30s era Gatsby wannabe rich kids decide to race a couple hundred miles to the coast at night. However they get stuck in heavy fog along the back roads and stumble into an isolated mansion where the creepy servant (John Hurt) tries to r*pe all the ladies, and something or someone is getting very stabby. Peter Cushing plays the "lord of the manor" and we see evidence of satanic rituals and cannibalism blended in for good measure.
A kinda disjointed flick that doesn't flow well. The protagonists are barely characters, and it feels like a late '50s-early 60s instead of '75. The story is good but mediocre execution hurts it.
5.5 outta 10 from me.
Island of Terror (1966)-
Another Peter Cushing flick but from 9 years previous to The Ghoul.
On a remote UK island people start disappearing. Local investigation finds boneless bodies (essentially piles of skin and flesh) that they can't explain so a couple of experts are brought in. Eventually they find out that a cancer research team has inadvertently created a silicon based life form that feeds on calcium and other minerals.
When I saw it I thought: "Wait a second. This plot is from an episode of the original Star Trek series! Even the creatures look the same." So I looked it up and it was from an episode called The Devil in the Dark, which is listed as one of the top episodes in most ST evaluations. However this episode was from 1967, so Star Trek was ripping off Island of Terror!
Everything here is done ok considering era and budget but it moves quite slow and focuses more on the mystery and events leading up to actually confronting the threat.
Early on the main actress comes off as strong willed, insisting she be involved in every step, only to revert to frightened femme who begs for protection when shit starts going down, which is kinda annoying. Cushing plays it all very straight forward, which is fine but rather non-distinct.
A 5 outta 10 from me. Needed an infusion of excitement as the creatures, while on one hand being a major threat, are very slow. The heros stand in place, shoot the creatures, then lob dynamite at them, and then go "Well that didn't work" and retreat a bit as the creatures inch their way forward. Not very suspenseful.
Curse 2: The Bite (1989)-
So I remember The Curse which is yet another adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft's The Colour Out of Space starring a young Wil Wheaton. It was a decent but flawed flick with a good story (but I haven't seen it in 30 years so my memory on it is a bit spotty).
Curse 2: The Bite is something else entirely.
A young couple is traveling west through desert scrub country and they encounter rattlesnakes at seemingly every turn. Eventually the boyfriend gets bitten so, for some reason, Jamie Farr (Klinger from MASH) gives him an antidote. The kids head on their way only for the bf's personality to start changing. An asshole local sheriff (played by the "always-good-as-an-asshole" Bo Svenson) harasses the couple. In the meantime Klinger realizes he gave the bf the wrong antidote and starts chasing them cross country. The bf goes full snake monster (mostly via his mutated snake arm!) and things come to a head as they try to kill the beast.
This one makes zero sense and is seemingly a precursor to ridiculous, intentionally bad SyFy flicks that came later. Klinger is ridiculous as the comic relief salesman who works with a bunch of psychotic truckers via cb radio to try to find the young couple.
But Screaming Mad George did the fxs, so they are a lot of fun!
3 outta 10 from me, but probably about a 6 outta 10 if viewed as a "so bad, it's good" flick. Some ridiculous fun hidden in the bizarre stupidity.
House of the Dead (aka Alien Zone) (1978)-
(No trailer, but here is a clip)
No, not the Uwe Boll much maligned video game movie but instead an obscure low budget 70's anthology film.
A business man leaves his lover's house and is mistakenly(?) dropped off in an isolated area during a big rain storm. He seeks shelter in an mortuary where the undertaker shows him dead bodies and tells them the tales surrounding their demises.
First a grumpy teacher who hates kids is scared in her house, and eventually attacked by zombie kids (?) (their only defining feature is huge teeth?).
The second corpse/tale involves a guy who invites women back to his place and then films hinself killing them.
The third story is about 2 world famous detectives who are trying to kill each other for some reason (pride I guess?). At least it actually has at least one decent actor in it.
The forth story is about an unempathic businessman who gets tortured and reduced to the homeless people he abused previously.
The framing story with the businessman and the mortician is probably the best of the lot but it's conclusion is as obvious as it is inevitable.
Not horrible considering the budget and era but a clunky, and dark (in appearance) film with poor acting and minimal fxs. I only continued watching it because I love anthology horror films but this one isn't very good by any stretch.
4 outta 10 from me. I appreciate the effort but the execution mostly fails.
