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Game Thread: Wildcard weekend

tabascojet

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Super Wild Card Weekend

Saturday, January 14

NFC: 4:30 p.m. (ET) (7) Seattle Seahawks at (2) San Francisco 49ers (FOX, FOX Deportes)
AFC: 8:15 p.m. (ET) (5) Los Angeles Chargers at (4) Jacksonville Jaguars (NBC, Peacock, Universo)

Sunday, January 15

AFC: 1:00 p.m. (ET) (7) Miami Dolphins at (2) Buffalo Bills (CBS, Paramount+)
NFC: 4:30 p.m. (ET) (6) New York Giants at (3) Minnesota Vikings (FOX, FOX Deportes)
AFC: 8:15 p.m. (ET) (6) Baltimore Ravens at (3) Cincinnati Bengals (NBC, Peacock, Telemundo)

Monday, January 16

NFC: 8:15 p.m. (ET) (5) Dallas Cowboys at (4) Tampa Bay Buccaneers (ESPN/ABC, ESPN2-Manningcast, ESPN+, ESPN Deportes)
 

Sharkonabicycle

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I gotta wait till 3:30 for this shit!? WTF NFL!?
 

megalodon30

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I gotta wait till 3:30 for this shit!? WTF NFL!?

It’s Saturday. We can football party all night long on the weekends!

(But not me because I have to get up for work early tomorrow. Thank goodness the Broncos aren’t in the postseason this year!)
 

megalodon30

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Looks like rain and thunderstorms around 3-4 o’clock in Santa Clara today.
 

DJ

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Looking forward to it.
 

Sharkonabicycle

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It’s Saturday. We can football party all night long on the weekends!

(But not me because I have to get up for work early tomorrow. Thank goodness the Broncos aren’t in the postseason this year!)

Well you can call work and tell them you have a case of explosive diarrhea... they shouldn't question you any further.... I've used this several times and it always works.
 

fightinfunbags

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Well you can call work and tell them you have a case of explosive diarrhea... they shouldn't question you any further.... I've used this several times and it always works.
My grandmother died 4 times in college to get me extensions on papers. My grandmother was a selfless saint who gave her life (4 times) for my academic benefit.
 

Sharkonabicycle

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My grandmother died 4 times in college to get me extensions on papers. My grandmother was a selfless saint who gave her life (4 times) for my academic benefit.

It's risky territory, because if it was a good school administration they'd ask where to send flowers or condolences... clearly you went to a poor school and I personally question the entire process.... but fair enough.

That said, explosive diarrhea raises no questions. Nobody wants to deal with that.
 

fightinfunbags

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It's risky territory, because if it was a good school administration they'd ask where to send flowers or condolences... clearly you went to a poor school and I personally question the entire process.... but fair enough.

That said, explosive diarrhea raises no questions. Nobody wants to deal with that.
I didn’t have to go to the administration or anything. It was a quick conversation or an email with the professor. I would have been fucked though if the professor called me out and wanted an obituary provided. I guess I could have dug up somebody else’s Mom Mom’s obit though.
 

Dr. Strangelove

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I didn’t have to go to the administration or anything. It was a quick conversation or an email with the professor. I would have been fucked though if the professor called me out and wanted an obituary provided. I guess I could have dug up somebody else’s Mom Mom’s obit though.
Holy shit, you had email? You're just a young whippersnapper. In my day, we had a hand written letter from our parents on parchment and the signature had to be a dead on match. Lmao. :D
 

Sharkonabicycle

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I didn’t have to go to the administration or anything. It was a quick conversation or an email with the professor. I would have been fucked though if the professor called me out and wanted an obituary provided. I guess I could have dug up somebody else’s Mom Mom’s obit though.

The conversation and effort required in email would've been avoided if you said you had explosive diarrhea....... and you'd had better grounds for a makeup test... The dead family member is overused... admit it, you got lucky. I would've given you an F and not fell for that Ferris Bueller shit.
 

fightinfunbags

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The conversation and effort required in email would've been avoided if you said you had explosive diarrhea....... and you'd had better grounds for a makeup test... The dead family member is overused... admit it, you got lucky. I would've given you an F and not fell for that Ferris Bueller shit.
Haha! You can’t get a paper extension for explosive diarrhea. The expectation is that you’re still working on that jawn at home in between trips to the bowl.
 

fightinfunbags

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Holy shit, you had email? You're just a young whippersnapper. In my day, we had a hand written letter from our parents on parchment and the signature had to be a dead on match. Lmao. :D
Yep. Email was still relatively new. Finished my undergrad from St Joes University in Philly (Jameer Nelson, Delonte West, Dr. Jack Ramsey) in 1999.
 

Sharkonabicycle

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Haha! You can’t get a paper extension for explosive diarrhea. The expectation is that you’re still working on that jawn at home in between trips to the bowl.

If the professor, employer, etc. is smart they'll look up the death certificate or previous history of you calling in your relative is dead. You can't fake that unless you're already employed by the FBI and US government... however, it's very easy to walk into the classroom or office of the professor after taking 3 doses of Dulcolax, 19 grams of fiber, and/or $10+ of Taco Bell with any of the shelf additive.

Can't get a paper extension for explosive diarrhea? Saying there's dead relatives to try and get one!? HAAAAAAA! Amateur at best........ I shit all over a professor in 2005 and got a 4.0 while playing Counter Strike the rest of the year. Hell the school paid me $10K additionally to sign a non disclosure agreement (so can't mention names)...

Now end of day, I'm not telling you guys to go shit all over your teacher... but..........
 
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