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The Last Movie You Watched (no spoilers)

Debbie Does

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Don't Look Up. I kind of liked it because it's Sci-fi. But, the scenario presented in the the first 5 minutes inescapably doomed the earth. No way we could deflect something that large, at that distance, in that timeframe.
 

Think McFly Think

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Watched Ghostbusters Afterlife a few days ago. I enjoyed it. Not as good as the original of course but worth a watch. I haven't and don’t ever plan on watching the female Ghostbusters but I believe that this one was probably way better.
Having your balls ripped off by a rabid wolverine was better than the female Ghostbusters. Afterlife was better for sure but the first two Ghostbusters should have been the only Ghostbusters movies made.
 

lilchi721

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What do you mean?
There are five contemporary historical texts that describe the duel. Two of those text, one written by the Monk of Saint Denis named Michael Pintoin who was the scribe of King Charles VI who was by the king's side and the other was written by Jacques Le Gris' lawyer, Jean Le Coq, are likely firsthand accounts and are considered to be the most accurate. In both the movie and the book, the duel begins with a joust. However both Pintoin and Le Coq describe both Carrouges and Le Gris as "abandoning their horses as soon as the marshal gave the sign for mutual attack. Le Coq stated that some of the people thought the lists (the barriers built to enclose the jousting area) were too small for lance combat, stating that "they had been made for two men who fought on foot and not on horses." In less reliable text of Jean Froissart who was a contemporary to both Currouges and Le Gris states that the two men "jousted for the first engagement, but nothing was forfeited." Froissart's book that contained the account was published in 1390, less than four years after the duel took place. However he was living out of the country at the time when the event took place and had heard the story from unknown sources. Out of the five texts only Froissart's one ever mentions a joust. To enrich the scene, Eric Jager, author of The Last Duel, quotes Froissart's account of an entirely different event, the Saint-Inglevert jousts of 1390. With the two most reliable accounts describing the duel as unfolding on foot , the account by Pintoin states that it began with two men holding their "threatening swords lowered" as they approached each other. In the first attack, Jacques Le Gris stabbed Carrouges in the thigh with his sword whereas in the movie Le Gris stabbed him in the thigh with a tip of a broken lance. Instead of pressing the sword deeper, Le Gris immediately drew it out. Blood emerged from the wound, which grabbed the attention of the crowd. Pintoin said that despite Carrouges' wound, "it increased his courage rather than his confusion." He goes on an describes Carrouges stepping in closer, grabbing Le Gris by his helmet, and throwing him face down. In the book Jager says either the weight of Le Gris' armor, exhaustion from fighting, or the shock of being thrown to the ground kept Le Gris from rising to his feet. However, the weight of Le Gris' plate armor alone would not have kept him from getting up. Pintoin said that Carrouges killed his enemy "with great difficulty" due to the armor. We know that it took some time for Carrouges to kill Le Gris due to the fact that Carrouges had time to demand that Le Gris confess to the r*pe and Le Gris had time to maintain his innocence. The gruesome nature of the battle may be one reason why the Parliament of Paris never sanctioned another judicial duel.
 

calsnowskier

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Power of the Dog

It was slow and boring, no doubt. It was not an “enjoyable” watch because of the pacing. But the story was legit engrossing. I rather enjoyed it.

7.75/10 (an 8 is too much since it was very slow and boring, but giving it a 7.5 doesn’t feel fair either)
 

Sharkonabicycle

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SpiderMan: No Way Home - 5/10 (Spoilers)

It really takes a lot for me to sit down and watch anything Disney these days... in the case of last evening it was pure and utter boredom looking for a movie. I turned off ... uh... Homeward Bound .... whatever, the 2nd one with Tom Holland about 1/3 of the way through because it seemed stupid as fuck, and this one was really no different.

So Peter is public enemy #1 because a guy said he was responsible for terroristy stuff... and reveals his identity. Uh, okay? Anyway, Peter is upset that he and his friends can't get into college so he goes to Strange for help. The plot seemed a little ridiculous when Dr. Strange was like, "Eh yah sure, let's impact everyone on Earth and wipe their memory of Spiderman since you can't get into College anymore." Uh, who cares about College? You know how many Companies would be lining up to hire those three with all the tech they know and what they did? "Yah I hacked a Stark suit's security. No biggie." "Yah I was Spiderman and used all this tech and am a genius in my own right." EVERY TECH COMPANY (and government for that matter) pretty much in the World: "HIRED! We'll start you at $500K!" I'm sure Michelle... uh... oh fuck it Mary Jane did something relevant outside of a love interest to warrant a similar reaction. Either way it's a female minority, someone would pick her up in today's day and age.

So anyway, Dr. Strange is like, "Ohh bummer, you can't get into College. Well we'll just erase everyone's memory of Peter Parker." Huh? So Peter Parker doesn't exist anymore to people. Okay..... I GUESS that makes sense? Anyway, it naturally goes wrong and opens different universes (kind of a cool concept) and all the villains from the first and second installments come through. Strange is like, "We need to send them home, they don't belong here." And then Moral May is like, "But they need help! And they'll die if they are sent back!" And Strange LOGICALLY says, "They don't belong here, there fate should be handled in their own universe." But Peter is like "NO! I am SpiderHelper!" and then battles and banishes Dr. Strange (WTF?).

So now Peter is going to magically cure them somehow with some magic Stark enterprise box that apparently just does that, cause that's easy. And then it all goes wrong cause Goblin lied (who didn't see that coming), naturally. May dies (I was like, "GOOD, stupid bitch - good job fucking it up) and Peter is upset and then the other two Spidermen Toby and Andrew come through. And at first you're like, "Hey, cool." And then it goes from 'cool to cringe' within minutes. The har har slapstick, goofiness, and jokes for the kiddies is just fully in your face. Now don't get me wrong the original series with Maguire and even Garfield had some silly moments... yes the dancing/emo Peter for one... but this was just getting TIRESOME. Like Jesus Disney, we get it, you're 'FAMILY!'.

Ugh, movie should've just been rated G and call it a day. In any event, Strange is like, "Oh you banished me to somewhere, stole my tech, ruined the Statue of America (now there's a giant Captain America shield on it), but oh cool you cured them." Seriously, the 3 Peters (another HAR HAR opportunity) go into a High School science lab and develop all these cures for Electro, Lizard, Green Goblin, Sandman... And then Dr. Strange ends up having to wipe everyone's memory anyway so... okay? He saved the other villains? Well that's a real slap in the face to the other Spidermen lol. "Anything you guys did I can do better!" Not to mention now the other Universes they came from are going to be completely changed and different. Yah, all those guys live... the rest of their lives in PRISON. Yah fuck you Marvel.

5/10 - good CGI/graphics/sound. Some action scenes were cool. The acting all around was as you'd expect decent, but the story and plot was pretty terrible. The slapstick was HORRIBLE and I didn't laugh once. Would never watch again and a reason I pretty much ignore everything Disney nowadays.
 

Sharkonabicycle

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Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City - 4/10 (5.5 if you've played the games)

Well where do I begin here. This was the Resident Evil I think a lot of the fans wanted to some degree back in 2002. The original mansion, Raccoon city, etc. The first Resident Evil with Milla Jovovich was widely regarded as one of the best video game movies of... all time? The action/pacing was decent, the action scenes were fun, the soundtrack was 'edgy' (for most, I thought it was stupid), etc. It had the balls to go rated R and show some gory scenes, OMFG LASERS! It wasn't a bad film by any stretch and the producers were smart enough to know if they went the EXACT route of the movies, the audience would probably not really go for it. Fans of the games though were kind of like, "The fuck is this?"

This movie on the other hand, was clearly made FOR the fans which is why I gave it two separate ratings. The movie starts out with a little girl in an orphanage who gets out of bed one night and walks around (even though she's not supposed to) and encounters a kid who is obviously infected or not normal. You don't see the kid but know something is up. The staff comes and takes her away and then it cuts to a scene STRAIGHT out of the new RE2 remake. Fast forward to... THE FUTURE! A familiar name (Claire Redfield) is heading into Raccoon City to meet up with her brother Chris complete with a truck driver eating the burger off the dashboard (shown in the game remake). We find out pretty quick something isn't right and there's zombie birds/people which is due to something getting in the water supply (dun dun DUUUUN!).

Umbrella Corporation who runs the town has been experimenting on kids in the orphanage to create a super virus for weapon purposes and it gets leaked into the water supply and as a result they now have an infestation. Claire turns out to be the kid from the orphanage so she's got her 'vengeance' plot line which kind of goes nowhere except the aforementioned infected kid bailing her out later in the film, whatever. Fine. Anyway, pretty standard and not a new concept (even back in the 90s) but provides for a good storyline/premise and RE went dark with it at the time. And then queue zombie stuff. This is basically the plot of Resident Evil 2 (video game).

The problem I have with this film, is it was a giant disjointed mess and just crammed in too much. At first I was like, "Oh they're just going to remake RE2 (the video game) into a literal movie. Cool." But then it started introducing elements of Resident Evil 1 as well. You meet all the initial cast early on (Jill Valentine, Wesker, Leon, Chris/Claire Redfield, etc.) which is fine and dandy, but it keeps skipping between that and Claire as a little girl at the orphanage and then skipping between those characters, taking you to different locations from RE2/1, it's just overwhelming. You get half of RE2 and half of RE1 with ALL the characters slammed into an hour and 50 minutes (surprisingly long for this kind of film). PICK FUCKING ONE and let us get invested in that story and those characters. Jill, Chris, and Wesker were basically it with RE1. And Claire, Leon were RE2. Now it's all smashed together, good lord. As a result, none of the characters act anything like their game counterparts and even if they did you have zero time to get invested in them.

All the familiar locations are there complete with little things like some of the puzzles and those 'keys' from the game and put in a live action movie which is great if you're a fan, but your brain barely has any time to absorb it. The first RE video game actually had a pretty interesting plot and lore to it... why didn't you just have it focus on RE1? "We've got reports of bodies found or something strange happening at the mansion (where Umbrella was operating). And just focus around that? That was the most interesting part of RE1 - not the zombies or 'scary dogs' etc. but the experiments and things being done. And it wasn't just the kids, the animals/plants/insects, etc. in the surrounding area were changing because of the leaked virus. It was really a cool concept.

Anyway, the film fast forwards through the mansion pretty quick. It gives you bits and pieces of RE1/RE2 which again is FINE if you're a fan. The CGI is HORRIBLE in some parts (namely the dog, one of the more scary parts and I burst out laughing when it was fully shown), clearly there wasn't much budget here (no surprise). The one thing I did appreciate was the soundtrack. It was just an unsettling tone for most of it with no real huge "BOOM" stupid jump scare noises. That was a big plus. The 2002 RE techno soundtrack was a little eye rolling... it took away any tension/scariness to the film lol. The acting was... forgettable. No real standout performances here.

Overall if you've played the first two games and are a fan, you'll find this OKAY and will follow along. If you haven't or are just going into this with a blank slate? Stay the fuck away because similar to Man of Steel (which somehow still has a 7.0 on IMDB) it's bouncing all over the place and your mind is going to struggle to keep up with any coherent story or ability to get invested in the characters let alone one of them.
 

DonMan

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As Young as You Feel (1951)

This was an entertaining movie. A factory worker is forced into retirement at age 65 because of the policies of a conglomerate that owns the factory. The worker decides to try to change the policy by impersonating the CEO of the congolmerate.
 

Judge Fudge

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Hitmans wife bodyguard. 9/10

Same premise as before but Selma Hayek was fucking awesome in it
 
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